The Secrets of America

England is a Very Mad Dad

"Seriously, how does a pirate faint like a school girl talking to a celebrity?"

America sighed, and walked over to England, who he started slapping repeatedly.

"Up and at em. Wake up, Furry Brows. Seriously, wake up, the Beatles are here!"

England twitched a little, but didn't wake up.

"Fine then," America said as he pulled out a gun from his back pocket. Pointing it at the ceiling, he fired.

The nations cried out in shock, and America rolled his eyes.

"Relax, it was a blank."

A couple minutes later, England was sitting up, rubbing his head.

"I just had the strangest dream," he mumbled. "America was a mercenary. A bloody mercenary! Can you believe that?" He chuckled, looking up, only to see America himself standing over him, highly amused smirk on his face. "Wazzup, Iggy?"

England started to fall back over, but America caught the front of his jacket.

"I swear to God, Arthur, if you faint on my ass again I'm going to put a bullet through your head," he growled.

England certainly woke up then. When did America start acting like... this?!

"Always, really. I just covered it up so people wouldn't be afraid of me."

'Wait... Did he just read my mind?!' England thought.

"Yep! One of your authors called it Leg-something."

England's vision started to go dark around the edges. Apparently Alfred noticed, because he pulled a gun out and pointed it at England.

"Try me."

Now, England is a very strict dad. And pointing guns at Daddy is a very big no-no.

"Young man, I will NOT be treated this way!"

America faltered. "Uh, Iggy, dude, you feelin' alright? Did you hit you head from all that fainting?"

England snapped. He cast a spell at America, who raised a Shield. See the magic that America just cast, England blinked a few times. America used this pause to knock him out with a spell.

So, yes, England fainted.

England will faint at the end of each chapter. Just sayin'.

No, I have no idea what happened with England. This people are self aware. I just write down what they do.

My guess is with America's. He hit his head a little too hard.