"How do you sleep?" It was question Amara had long ago asked Alex. How did he sleep? She was curious. I mean he lived in Greece, an entirely different culture, country and continent and she lived in the US. Maybe it was different. And she could ask that because it wasn't intrusive. She could ask Alex that and not feel guilty or nervous. She didn't think Isabel would mind. I mean it's just about sleep right? Another question she had asked. If you could do anything to me what would it be? And he had answered everything. He would do everything to her. And he would love it. She didn't believe him.
Lots of things happened between them. Late night Skype calls that they fell asleep on, s.exting, online s.ex, and many, many inside jokes. Their friendship was strong. She felt constantly guilty for never correcting him and straightforwardly telling him she was 14 not 15. She didn't want to seem older, but more respectable, smarter. She knew she could handle talking about difficult topics that everyone said she wasn't ready for or couldn't possibly understand. She liked being his friend because he never told her she wouldn't understand. He never told her she wasn't old enough to get it. He talked to her normally and when she didn't understand something, she would ask for a different perspective. Alex and Amara talked about everything. They were friends. Maybe you could say even Friends with Benefits. Weird name for a friendship. And all this, they never told Isabel, he didn't care. He told her he had masterplan to make her fall in love with him. That Isa wouldn't matter to him in 3 years. Just till I graduated high school. He said the I was the one for him. She still didn't believe him.
He told her that he would move to the USA one day and find her. She believed he'd come to the US but didn't believe he'd find her. He told her many things she didn't believe.
They shared family stories, memories and so many jokes. Their relationship was always a friendship, nothing more. They knew their boundaries and he did have a girlfriend, that he was married to via Facebook. I know, stupid right? They never talked about her. Was it avoidance? I don't know. The last time they actually, truly talked on Skype it was very relaxing. Also, it was getting late. Around 11 (23) pm her time and 7 (7) am his time he asked her if she wanted to fuck over Skype. She said no. It was the first time she had bluntly said no. He said that if they kept talking he would want to do it more and more, so she said then let me talk or let us be quiet. They were quiet for awhile. Then he said why? And she said I don't want use our friendship just to get off and also I like just talking to you. He said he loved talking to her too. Love. She never used that word with him. It scared her. He said that he stayed up all night just for her. She laughed and said she already knew that because she stayed up late sometimes too. They hushed up for a bit. She could tell they were both falling asleep, their breathing was long, consistent and deep. She was familiar with his breath. They had fell asleep over Skype before. He had once told her that listening to her voice calmed him and if she said the right words could put him to sleep. She had agreed with that. She was very close to falling asleep when he started speaking. It was quiet enough that if she wasn't paying attention she wouldn't have caught it. He had said "I love you."
They were not allowed to say that. It was forbidden.
He was with a different girl, yet he said it. She was startled and replied with "No you don't." He was a bit louder this time, "Yes, yes I do. I know it when I feel it." Amara didn't know what to say. She thought about his masterplan to make her fall in love with him. If he was saying the truth his plan had malfunctioned. It worked the wrong way. She said "You don't actually love me, but you enjoy spending time with me and I enjoy spending time with you. It's not love." He was more insistent now, "You're wrong Am, I fell in love with you." She was quiet and didn't believe him. They fell asleep on call.
That was the night her mothers found her asleep on call with some stranger they didn't know. That was their last call. That was the end. She thought.
She still didn't believe him. Never would she let herself believe him.
Sofa, Ed Sheeran
That's the song I had playing in the background.
I hope you guys like this so far.
xMe
YOU ARE READING
10 years
RandomPretty fucked up story, just being honest. It was quiet enough that if she wasn't paying attention she wouldn't have caught it. He had said "I love you." They were not allowed to say that. It was forbidden. He was with a different girl, yet he said...
