Moaning Lisa Smile

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Ryan was processing all the information he had just been told about his girlfriend.  I mean, it's not like she cheated on him, or killed anyone, but she was just mean.  I looked over to Brendon, he was sneaking glances at Nora while she was focused on the grass in front of her.  I wanted Ryan to break up with blondie.  But, I didn't want  him to be sad.  I wanted to date Ryan.  But I didn't want to be the girl who jumped in on the newly single Ryan.  I actually didn't know what I wanted at all.  Ryan's phone started to vibrate which caused all of us to jump at the sudden noise.  He hit the button and put it up to his ear.

"Hey.... Yeah i'm at a park with Brendon, June, and Nora.... She's June's friend.... Yeah that girl......"

Nora rolled her eyes.

"Where do you want to meet up with us?" He asked Angie.  Brendon sighed very exaggerated like and laid down on his back.  Nora giggled which caused him to look at her and smile.  I couldn't tell if Brendon's cheeks were flushed or it was just the natural lighting.

"Oh come on!.... fine..... yeah.... I'll meet you there.... Bye." Ryan said and hung up.  We all looked at him.

"I'm going to the mall to meet up with Angie..." Ryan said standing up and brushing grass off of his jeans.

"Are you bringing her back here?" Brendon asked.

"Probably not... she wants to hang out at the mall." Ryan said rolling his eyes.

"I hate the mall." Nora said standing up and following Ryan's actions.

"Yeah me too." Ryan said offering his hand to me.  I took it and he pulled me up.

"Um where do you guys want to get dropped off?" Ryan asked awkwardly as we walked back to his car.

"What do you mean?" Brendon asked.  Ryan didn't say anything, he just unlocked his car.  I wasn't sure what was going on, so I just sat in the backseat with Nora.

"She doesn't want to hang out with us, does she?" Brendon asked outside of the car.

"Just get in the car..." Ryan said quietly as he put the keys in the ignition.

"Dude I can't believe you're choosing her over us right now." Brendon said, finally getting in the passenger seat.  I couldn't help but feel jealous.  I was also mad at Ryan, even though I knew it wasn't his fault.  Obviously Angie doesn't like us, and she wouldn't want to hang out with us, or have Ryan hang out with us.  Ryan just turned on the radio and started driving people home.  I could tell Brendon was angry.  Ryan dropped Nora off first, then started heading to Brendon's place.  I thought it was kind of weird that he was dropping Brendon off first, but the tension was so awful in the car that I realized that was a good idea.

"Bye June." Brendon said getting out of the car.  He didn't say anything to Ryan, he just went inside his house.  Ryan was looking at me in the rear view mirror.  I was mad at him so I didn't move to the front seat.  He broke eye contact and started driving back to my house.  We finally pulled up in front of my building and when I was about to open the car door, he locked it.

"We need to talk." Ryan said.

"Okay."

"Please don't be mad at me."  He said with an almost begging tone.

"You know Ryan, sometimes you have to be an adult and make your own decisions." I said with an angrier tone that I thought I would.  He turned around to face me.

"I'm going to talk to her today, okay?  You think i'm happy about this?" 

"No I don't, so DO something about your feelings."

"You want me to do something about my feelings?"

"Do I need to repeat myself?" I asked.  I can't believe I was fighting with this boy.  I just wanted what was best for him but right now I feel like what's best for him is a slap in the face.  He leaned towards me and it happened so fast.  With his hand holding the back of my head, his lips were on mine.  I stopped breathing because I was so shocked.  His hand loosened from the back of my head as we separated.  I just had my first kiss.  And it was with Ryan.  We made eye contact for a brief second before his eyelids started to close and he started going in for a second kiss.  I pulled back.  He had a girlfriend and he wasn't going to do this to me.  He looked at me a little confused, so I did what I should have done thirty seconds ago.  I slapped him.

"Ow!" He said taking his hand away from me and putting it on his face.  I unlocked the car door and quickly stepped out of the car.

"June-" He started but I quickly walked into my building, up the stairs, and inside my apartment.

"Hey June-bug, dinner will be ready in an hour." Mama called to me.

"Okay!" I said and quickly went to my room.  I closed the door behind me and fell face first on my bed and cried as quietly as I could.  I just slapped Ryan.  Ryan!  The boy with perfect eyes, the sweetest personality, and probably the softest lips of all mankind.  My phone started buzzing.  Ryan was calling me.  After I didn't answer he sent me multiple text messages.

June i'm so sorry

I'm an idiot, please forgive me

Call me?

I shouldn't have kissed you

I read the signs wrong

I'm so so so so so sorry

I want to stay friends

I'm going to keep calling and texting you until you answer

I'm a total douche

I wiped my eyes, sniffled, and text him back.

It's fine.


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