Procrastinators on the Internet (Dan Howell/danisnotonfire fanfic 1)*unedited*

Part 4- Meeting KickthePJ

Okay, I’ll admit it: I’m not the ultimate crabstickz fan. I’ve seen a fair few of his videos, and subscribed, but I don’t feel like I know him as well as other YouTubers. I’ve also seen all of the videos he’s in with Dan, Phil, and their other friend, PJ. He’s pretty funny, but I never really got into his work. He’s still a growing YouTube star, someone who’s grown at a faster rate than me, but then guys always get more response for vlogging than girls. He’s also been on YouTube for longer, but that’s besides my point.

“How do you know who I am?” I asked him, curious and excited at the same time. This guy was on the verge of being YouTube famous, and he was friends with Dan and Phil! This person had actually met them, and he was friends with them. He had inside jokes with them and they knew he existed. I was tempted to film Chris more, preserve this memory on film, and I only just managed to stop myself.

“Like you said, I used to live up here, you stalker!” he glanced at me and widened his eyes for a second. “And I went to school with Mathew…”

“I’d suspected as much!” I grinned back. “Wait, where is Mathew? And this other friend of yours…?” I couldn’t help but hope that the friend was Dan or Phil or PJ…

“Ah, Mathew and Peej…” Chris said whilst he scrubbed at his hair. “Peej got distracted by some of the views around here, and he wanted to take loads of pictures and film some artistic stuff. I think he’ll like your converse, swing and trees thing, by the way. Oh, and Mathew stayed with him, you know, due to PJ having not been here before and stuff.”

So it was PJ. I was in a similar situation with viewing PJ’s videos as I was with Chris’, but that didn’t mean I held any less respect and awe for either of them. But then again, I really, really wanted to meet Dan and Phil, I mean, really really.

“What did you do?” I asked him accusingly, almost teasing. That’s the thing about watching vloggers; you get to know them, even just by watching a few videos. Even if they don’t know you. Even if they don’t know that you exist.

“I might have gotten bored and gone looking for the nearest source of food,” he replied quite proudly. I laughed slightly at his words, biting on my lower lip to stop myself from guffawing. “What? Have I got something on my face or something?” he said, acting shocked. He then reached up to his face and began clawing at his cheeks to remove anything that might have been on his face. This only prompted me to laugh more. Chris just grinned at me.

I gasped for air and held my hands over my mouth until I’d stopped. “Oh gods, I’m sorry about that,” I gushed through my hands, as I felt my cheeks darken, “I have a bit of an issue with laughing, I find basically anything funny!”

Chris rolled his eyes, but he continued to smile. “You’re not going to have a go at me for abandoning Mathew and Peej, are you?”

“No,” I admitted, finally stopping myself from laughing in his face, but still snickering partially. “I suggest we should go and find them…but then, I think food’s a given for a new target.” I thought back to my measly breakfast of an apple and felt my mouth water at the prospect of a sugary food source.

“Deal,” Chris replied without even hesitating. He sprung up and turned slightly to face me.

“Don’t worry,” I quipped, “I can help myself up.” Chris grinned at me again. Once I was standing next to him, I realised how tall he was, and how short I was, and I’m never called short. I know that Chris, Dan, Phil and PJ are all around the same height of the six foot mark, and I’m quite tall for a girl at five foot and eight inches. There was literally about a four inch difference between our heights.

It was then Chris’ turn to laugh. “And Mathew said that you were tall for a girl! You’re so short!”

I grinned at him and nudged him in the arm with my elbow. “Just because you’re a freak of nature in height doesn’t mean you can be like that!” I protested as I veered off towards the main park path. “Where did you abandon Mathew and PJ?”

“You’re acting like I lost two puppies, not two twenty something year olds!” Chris exclaimed, jogging a few paces to catch up with my spurt of speed walking. “They were by the lake, filming the ducks, last time I saw. And will you slow down!” I slowed my steps, smiling. I really needed to watch more of his videos, he was pretty funny.

“Oh, er, hey,” I said, remembering what I had decided to do about the park visit. “I was planning on doing a vlog about meeting up with Mathew today. Do you mind if-?”

“If I make a guest appearance? Of course not!” Chris grinned jokingly with his wide mouth. I shook my head at him, smiling throughout, and pulled the support strap of my camera away from my neck.

I started the routine of turning on my camera and turning the screen round to face us, holding it at arm’s length so that we could both be in shot. The record button blinked and turned solid.

“Well, well, well,” I said quickly into the camera, zooming in on my face and then zooming out again. “I still haven’t found Mathew, sad face”-I screwed my eyes shut and opened my mouth wide in a silent cry. I then relaxed my face again and laughed a little at the camera- “sorry for melting your eyes, guys! Anyway… Mathew’s friend found me. Now, fangirls, you may need to sit down and practice your breathing, but as if you’ll follow my advice. You’re more likely to crank up the volume and start hyperventilating at the screen, but then that seem like I’m talking from experience.” I flicked my eyes from left to right, as if I really was a ‘secret’ fangirl. Seriously, that is no secret.

“Get on with it, Mia,” laughed Chris.

I stuck my bottom lip out and looked off camera at him. “Fine. Here he is guys, my special and mysterious guest…crabstickz!” I spun the camera onto Chris’ face and began zooming in and out, enhancing the smears and pieces of dust on his glasses with each zoom. “Oooooh-eeee-ooooh!”

“Did you just sing the Doctor Who theme tune?” Chris asked me, raising an eyebrow as I continued to zoom in and out.

“Maybe.” I wasn’t about to deny it. I stopped zooming and turned the camera round, zooming out a little to get both me and Chris in the frame at the same time, as we walked towards the lake. “So, guys, right now, we’re going to find Mathew and PJ. Just so you know, this is definitely just one of those every-day occurrences in my life, right here,” I grinned broadly at the camera. “And we’ll just see how it goes from the-ee-ere!”

I squealed as a pair of hands grabbed down on my shoulders, frightening me. Chris gave a yelp as someone slammed their hands down on his shoulders as well. I was ready to punch or kick my attacker, when I heard him laughing and saw who it was.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, let me introduce my friend Mathew,” I said, glaring at Mathew, who was stood there, clutching his stomach and laughing.

“Oh my god! You have to let me watch that back to see your face!” he wheezed, wiping a tear from his eye. “Ahhh, I love that reaction of yours, Mia.” Mathew’s short blond hair was even spikier than usual, as if he’d been running his hands through it because I’d been late. His grey eyes were shining with real laughter induced tears, though.

I spun my camera to focus on him yet he continued to howl. I then heard the laughter of another guy. I tilted my camera to look at PJ, who was being glared at by Chris.

“What the hell was that for?” Chris asked, his eyes flickering behind his glasses.

“Oh come on, Chris, you would have done the same thing, and you know it!” PJ chuckled. He looked up at me from the corner of his eye. He didn’t even falter as he smiled at me and my camera. “Oh, you must be Mia, hello there.” He exaggerated his voice in the greeting, which made me want to instantly smile at him. He then waved a hand at me as I zoomed in on his face, an excuse to look at his features.

I’d heard fans of PJ talking about his eyes, his amazing green eyes. His eyes were greener than the lighting of his videos let on and the shade of green was only made more prominent by his green Legend of Zelda t-shirt, which he had a brown jacket over. His wavy brown hair was on the verge of falling into his eyes, too.

I hastily zoomed out and turned the camera round to look at me. “You’d better side with me and Chris with the shock of this, guys, or we will have to kill you.” Chris took this as a cue to come on screen, so he popped up over my shoulder, baring his teeth like a vampire. I saw what he was doing and copied him. We both laughed and Chris spun away from my shoulder, full frontal laughing, as I stopped filming.

I really do love being a vlogger.