Obsessed [h.s. au]

[10] Story Of My Life

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Written on these walls are the colors that I can't change
Leave my heart open but it stays right here in its cage
I know that in the morning now I see us in the light upon a hill
Although I am broken, my heart is untamed, still

And I'll be gone, gone tonight
The fire beneath my feet is burning bright
The way that I been holding on so tight
With nothing in between

Story Of My Life - One Direction

+

When I close the window, I let a deep sigh and fall in my bed. That was totally unexpected. I mean, since when does Harry worry about me? Apparently since...today. I have been thinking of him. Trying to find a flaw but I see none. He's an angel sent from God. He makes me feel so happy, so different. And he has no idea. The fact that I see him as something more than a friend, but he doesn't, saddens me to an extreme level.

It saddens me that when I picture my future he's always there. I know it's so unrealistic when I think about my future being with him, but I can't help it. I imagine us being together in our flat while we're in University, and cuddle up in the sofa, watching a movie and enjoying each other's company.

And yes. I do have dirty thoughts about him. Who wouldn't? He's a walking piece of art.

My mind wanders back to the times that he didn't know me. Is it better now? Having him by me but not being able to do anything? Keeping every emotion locked in? At least when he didn't know me, I was sure that nothing would happen between us. I was loving him from afar. But now, I always keep in the back of my mind that someday, somehow something will happen. Which brings me more pain than I thought it would.

I lay in bed and sigh. I curl myself in a ball and let my tears run down my face for one more night.

+

"Hey!" I hear Rachel saying cautiously.

"Hi."

"I'm sorry." She sighs.

"You should be." I tell her and she hangs her head in shame. "You told Mark. Didn't you?"

"Yes But-"

"Save it." I interrupt her and she frowns.

"Look Io-"

"I have to go in class. I'm sorry." I cut her off once again and she runs to catch up with me.

"At least let me explain." She lets her arms fall in frustration.

"Not now."

"After school. Please?" She begs me and I nod.

All day today I sat alone in the back of the class. I didn't want to talk to anyone. Harry came and talked to me at lunch but that was it. I spent the majority of it, alone.

I hear the final bell for the day and gather my things. "Do you still want us to talk?" Asks Rachel and I nod.

"Let's get over with it." We walk out of school until we reach a coffee shop nearby.

"Okay..." She says and takes a deep breath. "I'm so sorry for the other night. You have every right to be mad at me. I just wanted to give you a push. I know you would never do anything-"

"How do you know, I wouldn't do anything?"

"I know you for so long. It's your character. You're scared to take these kind of risks." She takes a sip of her tea and looks back at me.

"Why did you tell Ben?"

"It slipped. I'm sorry. We were talking about you one day and it slipped. I'm so so sorry." She says repeatedly but all I can think right now is that Ben, might say something to Harry. I'd be doomed.

"I bet he laughed." I chuckle bitterly and Rachel looks at me sadly.

She shakes her head in denial. "No. No, he didn't laugh. He was just stunned. He never thought you would have feelings for Harry. I'm sorry, Ione."

"Okay." I give her a small smile.

"Okay, what?"

"I forgive you." I smile at her and she gets up to take me in a bear hug.

"I missed you." She mumbles.

"I missed you too. Don't do that ever again." I warn her and she nods. "So...anything else, exciting?"

"Oh, yes. I decided to throw a party on Halloween."

"Really?"

"Yeah but, it's not like those parties where you see people dressing up ridiculously. My party has a theme." She rubs her palms and smiles at me. She's definitely excited about it.

"What theme?"

"Medieval." She says and my eyes widen.

"Are you serious?"

"Totally. The girls will wear all those pretty gowns and the boys these clothes that make them look like Princes. It's gonna be perfect." She exclaims excitedly.

"I bet. Brilliant idea."

"Oh, and I haven't told you the best part. It's a masquerade party. Everyone will wear all those elegant, mysterious masks. So cool." The conversation blooms between us. Topics and jokes, flying around.

"Enough about school. Do you know about Jane?"

"No?" I say but it comes out more like a question.

"She and Niall have been hitting it off very well." She wiggles her eyebrows and I raise mine.

"I knew it." I smile in triumph. "You should've seen how they were looking at each other the night we all got out." I point out and she nods.

"I noticed. I was more concentrated at you, though."

I frown. "There's nothing happening to me."

"How are things with Harry?"

"Same old, same old. He came to my house last night." I confess and she chokes on her tea.

"What?" She asks surprised. "How did he find where you live?"

I shrug. "He had given me a ride a while ago." I tell her everything that happened last night and all I can see is a grin stretching on her face.

"He was worried about you. How cute." She gushes.

"As a friend." I point out. "He made that totally clear."

"Nonsense." She waves her hand. "You have to make him crazy about you."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"Because I'm so awkward."

"Don't be like that. Do something. Anything. Don't just wait for something to happen. Make it happen."

"I'll keep that in mind."

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Surprise update. Yaayyy.

Please vote and comment. Don't make me beg. The lack of feedback makes me sad. :(

I'm so excited for the next chapters. Lots of things are going to happen.

Steph xx