Hardest of Hearts (VA fanfic) [Adopted from Fanfiction's Dareia]

LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON

Niko'sPOV
It was genetically impossible, but it was the undeniable truth. Guardian Dimitri Belikov was our father. Our father was a respected and feared guardian. We LEARNED about him, for Christ's sake! He was in our textbooks, in our theory classes, in our campus legends. And he was one shit-ass father who'd mentored my mother.

And had left her pregnant while still a student! My parents- I wanted to spit the plural out with as much venom as was running through me- had had an affair, a Student-Teacher affair! And here Sonja and I were: the damning evidence. As my dead-beat, phantom father, I despised the man and his cowardly actions, I despised looking like his teenage doppelgänger. But as a guardian... I still looked up to him and a part of me was proud to inherit both his skill and my mother's, to look like the next campus god. Screw that! I already was the next campus god, just as Sonja already carried on Mom's legend. A brutally traitorous part of me was incredibly, vainly proud to look like his teenage clone.

But then again, he had done irreparable damage to both my mother and us twins. He didn't deserve my respect, or Sonja's. Yet, I couldn't completely go against the drilled-in respect for him my training had dictated I carry; the admiration I possessed for the guardian who had shaped my mother into the legendary guardian she is, for the guardian whose exploits against the Strigoi with his student had been written into the history books, included in our curriculum. On the professional level, he was the perfect example. On the personal, however... he was just an absolute ass and the farthest thing from the perfect role model.

Why did they have to make this so damn hard! Mom wasn't an innocent in this secret, this deception. We- especially I- had denied wanting to know and know about my father because he had hurt Mom and I didn't want her in more pain. Little did I know Mom herself was partly the reason for her pain. SHE, had hidden this. SHE, had kept this to herself. SHE, had let him escape punishment, responsibility, and consequences for his actions. SHE, had left us without a father. All because SHE let Tasha Ozera steal him! Because SHE didn't fight for him, his return to the harsh reality. SHE, let him live in ignorance- let US live in ignorance.

Don't get me started on her, on Tasha. Tasha Ozera was far too sweet for her own good. Tasha Ozera was far too flirty with and possessive of our father. Tasha Ozera was far too jealous of our mother. Tasha Ozera was far too innocent to actually be as blind as she appeared. And Tasha Ozera was a name I didn't want to speak, a woman I never, EVER, want to be around again.

As mad as I was, it was at the situation they had created, not at them... well, not at my mother, at least. I may be mad at my father. No. Not MAYBE mad, I was mad. I was as absolutely furious with him, just as furious as Sonja was with the whole universe. My sister was spitting expletives like chips and cursing the universe for betraying her.

"She's an absolute- Gah! There aren't words! And him! God! The Russian slave driving jailor and our mother! I just don't get how Mom "forgets" to tell us we're purebreds!"
Sonja was fuming so passionately her Mom-take-2 face was bright red.
"She was scared," I reasoned. Though I couldn't say I didn't agree with Sonja's ranting. I understood her anger to a T. I just wasn't taking it out on the universe or my sibling.
My twin sent me an incredulous look. "You can't possibly be siding with her?"
"I'm not. I'm just stating a fact."
"Why would she be scared?" Sometimes she just made me want to pull my hair out.
"You know it hurt her to ask if we wanted to know. It's why we always said no."
Sonja handed me one of Mom's infamous glares.
"Think about it, Sonja. If you were Carrie and Carrie was my Moroi combat student and I slept with her then left, wouldn't you be scared? Wouldn't you be mad? Wouldn't you take the drastic actions Mom did? I'm not saying she did the right thing or that I agree with it- I'm as mad as you are- I'm just saying I begrudgingly understand her logic."
Her glare didn't shift. "Are you calling me a hypocrite? You wouldn't leave! You wouldn't knock up a Senior in the first place! You know what? I'm out of here- you're too much like him!" Ouch! "You're just like him! You're just as frustratingly calm and reasonable, just as logical, just as Zen as him!"
Sonja just stood and stormed out the door. I heard her fly down the stairs and slam the front door.

She was just as dramatic as Mom, just as impulsive. I sighed when only moments later a knock sounded on the door.
"Hang on!" I called as I descended to open the front door.
My gene giver, phantom father stood there. Oh, brilliant! What did he want? He put Mom through hell. So why was I going to be polite to him? Because I was exactly like him and polite to everyone. It was something I just couldn't help. I didn't have it in me to be rude... well, too rude. Much as I wanted to scream at him to rot in hell for betraying Mom, and me and Sonja.
"Is your Mom here?" His brown eyes- our brown eyes; his, mine, and Sonja's- stared at me calmly, neutrally. My own calm was out the window. He wore the same mask I should've been wearing. Yet my anger at him locked up my jaw and made my fists clench and shake. What I wouldn't give to deck the dude. Not like I'd get a hit on him anyway. His eyes traveled down to my shaking fists. "I'd like to see you try, Nikolai." Was there a hint of sarcasm in the old man's voice? Was I deluding myself, or was there a hint of amusement present too?
"Oh, wouldn't I love to hit you. You deserve it. And no, she's not here. Neither of us have anything to say to you, anyway," I answered icily and with an unwavering voice. I tried to shut the door in his face.
The bastard laughed and snapped his arm towards the flying door, blocking it like he would a punch. "Oh, I know I deserve it, Nikolai. But I also know you all deserve to know why I left in the first place. Oh, and how you're just like I was as a teen. I wasn't as controlled as I seemed. I know what it's like to have an," he cursed in Russian, "as a father."
I glared at him.

I hated glaring; I preferred to leave that to Mom and Sonja. Glaring was the female Hathaway specialty. But a traitorous part of me was intrigued as to his openness when he was renowned for being mom's polar opposite, her quiet and controlled counterpart, making him her ideal guarding partner, making them the preferred choice to be Aunt Lissa's or anyone's guardians.

Why did they have to both be renowned, admired, and parents- MY parents? Out of everyone, why did Sonja and I have to be the offspring of Rose Hathaway and Dimitri Belikov? Why did we suddenly have the most badass guardians as our parents? Why did we have to now have the pressure of living up to both their reputations?

"What makes you think we're going to let you explain being absent since we were conceived? What makes you think the girls are going to listen to a word you say? That I'll let you speak?"
"Shut up, Nikolai Hathaway, and let him in. He's still your father, when push comes to shove," Mom's voice boomed from behind Guardian Belikov. "Besides, I want to hear his weak-ass excuse."
"Hey, Roza," Belikov spun and smiled at my mother.
"Ew!" I exclaimed and backed away from the door. He so was not FLIRTING with Mom... was he? Ew! No! Just... No! That's so wrong! And gross. He's, like 40, and she's, like, 34. They're too old to be flirting! Especially with me here. And I don't know where he got the guts from to do that when she was furious with him.
"I'm still mad at you, Comrade," she unleashed a smile that I only saw... well... never. It was one that would make any man follow her like a lost puppy. And apparently my father was no exception.
"Ew! Stop flirting!" I so don't need a tiny sibling he'll walk out on too.
"We weren't," they sang in unison while she tugged him in through the door. "Now," she turned to him and gestured to the sofa. "Sit and explain yourself. You too, Nikolai."
"Mom!"
Her eyes narrowed dangerously while Belikov sat. "Don't talk back, Nikolai Hathaway Belikov. I'm not in the mood for you to suddenly turn into your sister. SIT," she ordered.
The addition of his name made me recoil and sit on the closest sofa. First Sonja says I'm too much like him, now Mom goes chastising me with his name. It bloody hurt. I didn't want her to acknowledge it, I didn't want Mom giving him the satisfaction. Mom sat on the opposite sofa to him but the tension between them was so palpable I was suffocating.
"Explain," I ordered Belikov.
His eyes narrowed as Mom's had. "Don't speak to guardians like that, Nikolai Belikov." Ouch! That burned like a bitch.
"He's a Hathaway," Mom reminded with a glare. "Now, explain why you're here."
"I wanted to explain what actually happened the night I left." He met both my eyes and Mom's. "Where's Sonja?"