Book 1: What We Had in the Beginning

Chapter 7: Moscow Lights

I leave the training room feeling giddy. Even though I'm sore all over and some parts of my body's in immense pain, I'm happy. My stomach rumbles as I head over to the dining hall for dinner. I can hear the girls talking from down in the basement and know they're getting ready for bed. Once I get to the dining hall the chef already has a plate waiting for me. No one else's around, all the officers must've already went to bed. Picking up my plate, I decide to find somewhere else to eat. The stairs leading up have me itching to climb them, to see what's beyond the 5th floor. I don't know where I'm going or what I going to do but I eventually find myself walking past the 5th floor. You're becoming reckless Natalia, yet I'm still going. 6th, 7th, finally I make it to the 8th floor. The 8th floor's a long hallway with endless doors running down. It's dark and dirty, more dirty than the first 7 floors, and cracks in the ceiling bring in light that illuminates the walls and floor. Dead rats and paint peelings lay scattered around my feet causing a stale, moldy smell to fill the air. No one must come up here. I slowly make my way down the hall, making sure to stay alert. Since I can barely see, my hearing's at full attention. I eventually make it to the end of the hall and I'm faced with a black door. Above it there's a broken EXIT sign that looks like it's about to fall from the ceiling. Pushing at the door with my left shoulder, I'm surprised when it actually opens. Bitter cold air nips at my face and makes tears form in my eyes. I close them and welcome the cold as it blows back my hair. I can't help but smile as goosebumps form all over my body. As I step through the door I look around, noticing I'm on the roof. The door softly closes behind me and I begin walking towards the edge. My eyes open wide in amazement as I see bright lights in an array of different colors far off in the distance. I've never seen anything like it before. The way it lights up the sky and how you can see it even though it's miles and miles away. I can tell we have to be at least an hour away from where ever that is yet I can still see it from the thick forest that separated us.

"What is that?" I ask quietly to the person who I can sense is standing behind me.

"Moscow." The Soldier answers, stepping forward to stand next to me. So that's what Moscow looks like. We've studied it and learned to fall in love with it, yet I've never seen it before. We've learned everything there is to know about the Motherland, yet we aren't allowed beyond these walls.

I don't look over at the Soldier, I don't have to. I know he's just as amazed as I am even though his face is no doubt blank. He has a knack for sneaking up on people but so do I. Even though I didn't hear him, I felt his presence and that's all it takes.

We stand there for a couple minutes seeing who'll move first. With a sigh of defeat, I sit down at the edge of the building and dangle my legs over so it's hanging off. Eventually the Soldier does the same. We both eat in silence, enjoying each others company. It's nice not having to hear the other girls eating and talking and the officers joking around with each other. Instead, it's peaceful and quiet.

"What's your name?" I blurt out subconsciously. I blink a couple times trying to comprehend what I just did. How could I be so stupid? I'm slipping. I'm not in control of myself. I sneak a glance at the Soldier and find him smirking. He knows I'm starting to lose control of my thoughts and words, and he enjoys watching it happen.

"I don't know." He answers honestly. I finally look over at him and study his demeanor. He's trying to hide the fact that he's uncomfortable. Yeah, doesn't feel good now does it? These people took away the memory of my parents, they must have taken away everything from him. Even his name. A wave of sadness hits me, what has he been through? Sadness soon turns into anger. What are these people trying to accomplish? What are they planning for us to do? We're just a bunch of puppets they're controlling. I turn back towards the lights and sigh out in defeat. There's no way out of here, except if you die or become exactly what they want you to be.