I can't stop and it's killing me. I want to supress all of my thoughts by writing.
- - -
I miss him. No. I miss the way he treat me.
I miss the way he treat me like I'm the most important person in his world, the way he always remind that he loves me and the way he make me feel that ... at last I am being LOVED by someone.
My overwhelming joy beat the logic out of me. I cannot think rationally when I'm having conversation with him. All I wanna do is to feel the love he's giving, even if it's a big freaking lie.
Can someone tell me.. how can you forget someone who's the only one giving the every attention you need?
I don't exist in someone's life before. I felt like I'm not included in their lives, like I'm an outcast.
I'm fine by that, before he show me, how it felts to be loved.
It was something I can't let go.
I know it can destroy me, but I didn't do anything. Instead, I let him to push me in a deeper grave of mine. I officially gave him the power to destroy me but I didn't care.
I miss him. I miss him so much. So much it hurts. So much it kills me.
The way he make me feel is something I cannot forget,
No matter how painful it is,
No matter how badly he wreck me, I just can't let go of all the things that he did, simply because I felt alive.
Because of him I felt alive and existing. So how the hell can I forget him?
