Guitar Strings || L.H.

19.

Its been a week and a half since luke got mad at me and now I feel like we will never see eachother again, only in the hallways of school and the apartment. I have been depressed lately, i stay in my apartment all day, i dont go to school and i now realize that im beginning to starve my self. Im going crazy with out luke.

I miss him.

I love him.

I want to see luke but i know he doesnt want to see me. He will probably never want to see me.

Just then i heard a small knock on the door. I got out of bed for the first time in days, leaving a slight body mold. I lazily walked to the door wondering who would want to visit me.

I opened the door to calum.

"He-" I cut calum off by jumping into his arms and emmidiatly started crying. I don't know why but I did.

"Uh reyna, what's wrong?" He asked awkwardly rubbing my back in comfort.

"Luke." I whispered shakily. "I want luke calum. I miss him."

"Well, then why don't you go see him?" He asked confused.

"I can't, he doesn't l-love me." I cried a little more.

"Oh..." He said not knowing what to say.

"Calum?" I said looking up at him after a long period of silence.

"Yeah reyna?" He asked looking down at me.

"Do you love me?" I asked quietly. (A/n as a friend ya know?)

"Yeah reyna, of course I love you." He said and held me tighter.

Little did she know he meant it in a different way.

---------------

All day I sat in my apartment like usual, but this time i was with one of my best friends, calum. We watched 3 different movies and cal made me eat some mac-n-cheese. It was nice having calum around, he is so sweet and comforting. But he wasn't like Luke...

Lukes hugs made me cozy.

His smile would brighten up my day.

His laugh could cure a sickness.

His voice makes me smile.

Him in general, is just amazing.

I love him, but he doesnt love me.

This all my fault.

Luke was right.

I shouldnt hang out with my ex.

I should hang out with my boyfriend.

It was now, that I realize that I was ignoring luke. I was so caught up into talking and hanging out with my ex, that I didn't realize I was leaving luke out.

How could I be so stupid?

I really want to apologize to Luke. I need to.

"Cal, I'll be right back." I said getting up and he nodded. I slipped on some fluffy boots and walked out of my apartment and next door, to Luke's apartment.

I heard music blasting through the door. I knocked hoping he would hear it.

No answer.

I knocked again a bit louder.

No answer.

I knocked again, "Luke please answer the door. I need to talk to you."

He still wasn't answering.

I got a bit worried and decided to text him.

Me -- Luke please answer the door. I really need to apologize. Please Luke.

A few minutes passed and he wasn't answering the door or my text.

I sighed in frustration.

"Luke... I'm sorry." I said sliding down on the floor. "I'm so so sorry that I was hanging out with Eddie and I'm sorry I wasn't hanging out with you. I guess I just was so excited when I saw him, you weren't even on my mind. Oh wait that sounded bad. I'm sorry. I should have hung out with my boyfriend instead of my ex. That was stupid of me and I regret every bit of it luke. I really do. I know you are pissed with me but please answer your door luke. I am so damn sorry for everything. Everything is my fault. I'm sorry that I'm not a good girlfriend luke. But try to be, I really try. And right now, I'm trying to make you understand that....that you are the best thing that's ever happened to me. I love you luke, I love you so fücking much and I never want to see you sad and angry anymore. I want you to be happy luke. I'm sorry that I made you angry because I was be stupid and I didn't realize that you luke were the person I should have been laughing with. But I wasnt. And I am truly sorry luke, just please open the door." I didn't realize I was crying. I whiped my tears away and stood up.

"Hey reyna, what are you doing here?" I heard Ashton's deep Aussie voice behind me.

"Oh I'm waiting for luke to open the door so I can see him and tell how much I am sorry instead of saying through the door.'' I wiped another tear away.

"Oh well I was just going to come over and hang out with him. Is the door unlocked?" He asked and I shook my head no. He pulled out a small silver key and unlocked the door opening it and stepping in Lukes apartment.

"Ya coming?" He asked walking in. He turned off Lukes music.

"Yeah." I need to prepare my self to see luke because no doubt he doesn't want to see me. By the time I stepped into Lukes living room Ashton was already walking down the hall to Lukes bedroom. I slowly followed. As I was walking down the hall Ashton came back running toward me.

"Reyna, you can't go back there." Ashton said pulling me in the opposite direction of Luke's bedroom.

"Why not? I need to see luke." I said tugging away.

"No reyna, trust me you don't want to go back there." He said looking me in the eyes.

"But I do, ashton I want to see luke." I said with one last tug I got out of Ashton's grip and ran to Lukes room.

I walked in there to see luke with bloody wrists and alcohol bottles surrounding him. He wasn't breathing. His eyes were closed. He was completely still. He was dead.

I began to cry and cry and cry. I felt Ashton's arms twist around me.

"L-luke." I sobbed. "He, he is dead."

Ashton rocked me back and forth while saying comforting words in my ear.

I sobbed into Ashton's shoulder. "This is a-all my fault a-ashton"

"Shhhh, non of this is your fault reyna." He said rocking me back and forth. "Something's are meant to happen."

A/n sorry!