today in english we read an article about the complexity arc.
it was based off of physical actions, but got me thinking;
what about actions of the emotion?
I am sad sometimes.
SIMPLE.
I am happy most times.
SIMPLE.
I am everything and nothing all at once,
insecure with confidence.
Complex as hell.
Why do I sometimes want to cry?
My insecurities get in the way of my developing relationships amongst other people and I can't handle it.
My emotions are too vulnerable for trust, bonds.
I've been hurt so many times and so many ways,
that it's almost hard to go back.
I am happy.
The happiest.
I feel cute and confident.
I hear that one song and I never realized how beautiful it was, until I had a connection to it.
Until it reminded me of,
I love that song.
I can't lay down, I feel like I am standing.
What's the point of love and life and all of these L words when it changes nothing in the end?
This is chaos.
This is time frozen still, begging to be released in order to just breathe.
This is this middle arc.
This is where I am,
the middle.
Always and forever.
Middle class, middle social, middle, boring.
At least now I have a sense of belonging in my complex world.
