Dear You,

Bradley || Camille

Oh my, Bradley. Where do I start?

You were there since the beginning. You met me in when I was in a place that not even I knew that I was in. In a world of black and white, you were the person that I saw in color. You were the one that brought color into the my life--you know, the one that I thought was so useless. I was a black and white girl.

The night you saw me crying, at my absolute rock bottom, you held me in your arms for what felt like seconds. Bradley, I did not know that someone like you could turn hours into seconds. You were a person of miracle. What you said to me that night still lingers in my mind.

While I saw the red in roses, the purples of the violets, and the beautiful color of the pink lotus you gave to me on my birthday, I had forgotten that black and white were colors that I had once felt. That black and white was something that I lived with. I didn't know you'd be the one to show me the significance of color.

God, I fucking adored you.

You said, "It's funny how we allow words to define us." You're right. Words don't define us. As if a phrase made by a combination of twenty-six letters actually characterizes us. That will stick by me for the rest of my life. But what made me happiest was that you never let words define you. We're drowning in a world full of words and numbers and you never even accepted anyone's compliments.

You hypocritical bastard.

Because we don't let others choose words for us. We are our own person. We are not 'genuine.' We are not 'nice.' We are not what that last person that wrote that 'truth is' on your Facebook said. You specifically told me not to allow such words stick to me like that, and if they do, they must stick loosely. How else was I supposed to start over and see in color once again? After all, I was merely a black and white girl.

And while you constantly told me to let me define myself, the last words you've ever left for me were words that have been super glued to my damn ego. Because I was the 'love of your life' and the girl that you'd 'never let the world ruin ever again.' Had they been spoken words, they wouldn't have been as stuck tight as they are right now. You left them in a letter addressed to me. You left them in a stupid letter that I could see and what's worse is that you put it in blue pen. Blue.

Now, the color of the sky and the ocean reminds me of you, your goddamn letters, and your words that described me.

What's equally as bad is that as I began to see colors, it was draining your powers of seeing colors as well. I'm so sorry, Bradley. I became a girl whose traits were a rainbow and you became a black and white boy. You never told me, and I suppose that's what hurts most. What kind of person didn't tell their best friend that they lost the ability to love the color of the green grass and the colors of autumn?

I know you're long gone, but if you ever want to come back, I'm here.

Sincerely,

The girl who is black and white again.