How she found me

Chapter 4

It hurts to know that you lost someone,a special someone, that hurts themselves in a way that makes you feel depressed to the edge of insanity,that makes you feel useless to your purpose,that shows you that not everyone can be saved or wants to in any sort of way...What he could feel I felt,when he cried I felt sad,when he doughted himself I knew,when he hurted himself I felt his pain,I felt hurt because I can't do anything about it...

I can't stop him...

And it's killing me slowly. I wished that I could hug him,tell him that things are going to be alright. Sadly I know it's a lie because he'll do it again. Doesn't matter how many times I save him,or what I might say to him if I could. Would he even listen?

I dought it.

(Italics are ''her" thoughts)

I was in my parents room...it was empty and full of dust,there didn't seem that anyone has been in this room for a while. And the thing is that I can't say anything I can't seem to think right I just seem to remember blurred faces,hushed voices...but one of them just made its precense clear
"Didn't I tell you something was wrong? They knew it all along! And they never told you! See what does this mean? It means that they are liars,that they don't speak the whole truth,that they're hiding something! So do you hear me know! I was right! You were wrong! Look up at the ceiling and tell everyone that it's not fair! Why did they die? How did they die? Where were we when that happened? Were they even with you? Did they even care?" It started laughing histeracly.

I felt damaged somehow...like if this was just a perfect world.

"Hey! This world is perfectly fine with me! Your the only one that doesn't get that. Your born,you grow and meanwhile you grow you learn until you loose your life and then you die! The end!" He laughed at me while I cried.
"Shut the fuck up!!! It's not my fault they're dead!!" I screamed.
"Well true...but still you could of prevented it" it said chirpy.
"And how would you know that! Your just another one of those things that make me feel like shit! So what can you know about this!!"I asked.
"Oh...dear Shawn I know more than what you think I take for granted and we all know that this is just the beginning! So live fully while you have the chance! My old friends are slowly coming back." He said excitedly.
"What do you mean by that?" I asked,but he didn't answer immediately clear.
" oh you will see" that came out more like a whisper and a promise than anything else.

-Shawn...are you okay?-Sky asked.

I just stopped crying since I hate doing it in front of people.

-yeah...I'm good...you?-I said while standing up and dusting myself.

I turned around just to be hugged again...he was crying too but he still managed to keep trying to make me feel better and I will always appreciate that from him. I always have and I'll always will. It was comforting and I needed comfort.

We both cried in silence for a while and we stopped hugging each other. We wiped the tears away and laughed because this was a little too sad for our liking, we stayed there staring at each other for a while in complete silence until he broke it.

-you hungry? I heard that hospital food isn't that good over there-he said stepping away a few feet from me but still keeping that smile of his.

-yeah sure,the food there isn't that bad you know-I said.

-I know but there's nothing like a batch of fresh tacos in the early morning No Crees mi amigo? Some tacos for tu and for yo-he said.

-dude at least I know your Spanish is still terrible what a relief- I said sarcastically.

After that we just went to the kitchen and while he did the tacos I just stared out the window.

-how did it happen?-I asked.