You Are All I Need

Chapter 1

"I hope shes worth it" My mom choked out seeing me crying on the couch. Dad looked down at the floor in shame and slowly got up and left the room. I looked over at my mom who had absolutely lost it, but I had to stay strong for her, and for everyone.

I woke up in a heap of sweat. I hated those horrible night mares. That night replaying over and over in my mind. I sit up and tears start to trickle down my cheeks. I fight back the rest of the tears that want to be let out. I turn my head and see that my clock reads 5:30. I wipe the tears off my face and decide to take a shower before school and try and wash away everything.

I turn on the shower and let the water flow from the shower head. I undress and climb into the shower to be met by the warm water. It completely takes over my body and wakes me up. Too bad waking me up only made me think more. The longer I thought about the subject the bigger the knot in my throat got. Eventually I was on the floor balling my eyes out. Why did this have to happen to us? I thought everything was going so well. What happened to the happy family we use to be? I couldn't think straight anymore, I was just a mess. I finally pulled myself off the bathroom floor and washed my hair while silently crying. Once I was finished I turned the shower off and got out. I wrapped my towel around my body and went back into my room. I hadn't realized how long I had been in the shower till Looked at the clock and saw that it was 6:15. I had to leave for school in 45 minutes so I have to pull myself together. 

I slowly make my way over to my closet and pick out a salmon colored singlet and a strapless bra. I throw it on and walk over to my dresser. I open the very last drawer and pull out a thong and put it on before grabbing some denim shorts and putting them on right after. After that I walk right over to my dresser and put my contacts in before starting on my hair. I really don't care how I look so I just blow dry it and straighten it. Then I put on some cover up to hide the bags that had started to form under my eyes and eyeliner and mascara.

Once I'm done I take a long look at myself in the mirror. I don't look like the same girl I did a month ago. The one who didn't care what people thought of her, the girl that could did whatever she wanted.  I now look like a girl who cares. A girl who cares about what people say about her, the girls who doesn't do whatever she wants because she fears of being judged. I just want the old me back, but it feels like she left when my family broke. 

I quickly stop myself before I start to feel bad for myself again when I know that people have it so much worse then I do. I take a deep breathe and make my way downstairs to get some breakfast. My mom is still in her room with the door closed so I figure shes still sleeping. I walk into my kitchen and grab a granola bar from the pantry. I take a seat at our bar and silently eat my bar. I hear footsteps coming down the stairs so I turn around in my chair.

"Hey Honey" My mom smiled through red eyes.

"Hey mom. How are you doing?" I asked.

"Better then I was" she slightly chuckles.

"Good. I'm glad to hear that. I have to go brush my teeth so I'll be right back to talk to you before I have to leave for school"

"Alright sweetie" my mom tries to smile but I know how bad she is truly aching inside. I get up and walk into my bathroom and just stare at myself in the mirror for second and just think about how horrible I feel seeing my mom like this. She is always there for me so I always have to be there for her. I love her with all my heart and I have to show her that. I quickly brush my teeth and I walk into my room to grab my backpack and phone and slid on a pair of black Toms before making my way back down to the kitchen. My mom is sitting down at the dinner table just staring into space. I walk over and set my bags down and take a seat next to her.

"Its going to be fine mom" I say trying to comfort her.

"You know, its suppose to be me saying that to you. I feel like I can't take care of my own daughter and she has to care of me because I'm a mess." she says with tears threatening to come crashing down at any moment.