Empty [h.s.]

Chapter 22 "Is Harry Secretly In Love With His Best Friend?"

January 1. A day of promises. Promises of new beginnings mostly. That is exactly what it was for me, a new beginning. I now get to start over with Sam and hopefully have a better year than the last one. I spent all of New Years Day with Sam, which was really nice. We just stayed inside all day, watched movies, stole kisses, and exchanged "I love you" throughout the day. I don't know why, but I still couldn't get Harry off my mind. I wondered constantly about what he was doing and if he was okay.

I know I definitely love Harry and I told Sam that I love him, but is it really love if you love someone else more and you know it? Is it fair to Sam to be in love with Harry still when I told him I wasn't? These questions haunt me, and are the main reason I don't get very much sleep at night.

So instead of going to a therapist like I probably should or asking a girlfriend of mine that I evidently don't have other than Gemma, I vent on my blog...

"

Dear Whoever Actually Reads This Blog,

A new year means new beginnings, but that is easier said than done. Despite the lovely proposition of a new you and new year, it would seem that the same old problems plague me. They don't just automatically stop once a new year begins. If anything they probably grow.

I told my current boyfriend I love him, although, I'm not sure if it is completely love or if it is just thankfulness for the little help he gives me to take my mind off of the other man. I feel awful for leading him on in a way, but I can't help it. The problems I have just won't leave me alone.

When I decided to move on I didn't know it would be this hard. At this point it is seeming nearly impossible. I just don't know what to do. If anyone has any ideas leave them in the comments for me. I could use the help, thanks.

Thanks for listening,

Just Grace

"

I post it, shut my laptop, and decide to go grocery shopping. It is terribly cold outside now and I don't think I will ever be ready for winter completely. I wish I could go into hibernation, but I'm not a bear. I am human. Sometimes being human sucks.

After wrapping myself up in my warmest coat, scarf, hat, gloves, and boots I head out into the cold tundra. I scrape off the snow and ice that stuck to the windshield of my crappy old car while trying to avoid getting frostbite. Finally, I get into my car and wait for the heat to kick in. My nose is red and my cheeks are tingling, I can't even feel them. After a fairly lengthy drive to the super market, I make it inside the warm complex.

After browsing the isles for sometime I feel a pair of eyes on me. I never liked the feeling of being watched so I turn around to see who it was staring at me. Three girls all about the same age giggled and blushed when I looked at them, and one stared to whisper something to the other two girls. I'm not sure what is going on, but they must be fans of One Direction. The fandom knows who I am and know that I am just friends with Harry and the other boys, but of course there are always some fans who think I should be dating one of the boys. My favorite were always the photos of Harry and me kissing or holding hands together. But like I said they were always only photoshopped, never real unfortunately.

I turn back around, but shortly after I feel a tap on my shoulder. When I turn around again, I am met with the three girls I saw early with someone who must be their mother.

"Hi!" The girl who must be the oldest said and waved at me. The other two were to shy to say a peep while the oldest girl took charge. "I'm Karman, this is my two younger sisters Helen and Kelly. They're twins." Karman simply stated.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet all three of you. Can I help you with something?" I ask looking to Karman for more conversation, I doubt I will get anything out of the other two girls at all.

"Are you Grace Newman?" The youngest girl, Kelly, asks me a little shyly. I couldn't contain my smile when she asked me this, she was just simply to cute asking.

"Yes, I am."

"Oh my God! Okay, can we, like, get a picture or something?" Karman is back to talking.

"Sure! Absolutely!" I agreed and the mother snaps quick picture of all of us together.

"Before we leave you, I just want to tell you that I totally ship you and Harry together, and I know it is probably weird hearing me say that because you two are friends and nothing more. I know he is marrying Lisa, but I always thought you two would be better together. Lisa comes across as a bitch to me, so you should totally try to stop that and, yeah, just please be together." Karman rants and I can't help but chuckle to myself because this girl has ever even met Lisa and she could be more right about her.

After I say goodbye to the girls I turn around and begin shopping again. It didn't take me long before I was done, and had gotten everything I needed. The checkout lines were long, but I was willing to wait. The magazines featured celebrities on the cover, some I know some I don't, I guess that is the perk to being best friends with Harry my whole life. One in particular catches my eye. It has a picture of Lisa and Harry together. The headline reads "Lisa Pregnant?" I wouldn't be surprised if Lisa's publicist put this out there so they could be in the headlines. It is absolutely ridiculous.

Just as I put the magazine back down to its rightful place I see one more magazine, but this headline was not about Harry and Lisa. It was about me and Harry. It read "Is Harry Secretly In Love With His Best Friend?" I scoffed and moved on.

I can clear that up for them right now. No. Harry is not in love with me or else he would be marrying me and not Lisa. Like I said, headlines are always false.

//////

A/N: Headlines, newspapers, and magazines don't know the half of it.

Niki xx