I sip the tea. Ugh, horrible, insipid English breakfast tea. Twinings. The teabag has barely blinked at the water, let alone been allowed to steep so it has some flavor. I don't know how Ana can drink this vile stuff. But it's so her: my Anastasia, marching to the beat of her own drum. Fuck knows how I ever thought she'd make a good submissive. Yeah, I'm a fucking king at reading people.
I don't even try to sleep. When I'm sure she's not awake, I draw up my chair next to the bed and watch her. My girl. So stubborn. So beautiful.
I slip away before she wakes and try to outrun my demons again. But I never do. They always catch me. Taylor is his usual taciturn self but I can tell he's worried. Probably worried about Anastasia. There's definitely a bond between those two and it really fucking pisses me off. I trust Taylor with my life - in fact I've had to on more than one occasion, but if it weren't for the fact I know he's in a relationship with Gail, I'd have to seriously fucking think about keeping him on with Anastasia in the apartment. I'd have all female fucking bodyguards if it would keep my angel safe.
She's waiting for me when we get back.
"Christian, we have to talk. I've had enough of your sulking."
Sulking! I'm not fucking sulking! I'm... And suddenly I'm unsure. What the fuck am I doing?
She starts to speak and I'm mesmerised by her words:
"I give you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, to stand by your side in good times and in bad, to share your joy as well as your sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals and dreams, to honour and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and bring you solace in times of need. And to cherish you for as long as we both shall live."
I think my mouth has dropped open and it's hard to breathe. A pain without name fills my body.
"Christian, those are my vows - my promises to you. Please, say something to me Christian."
But I can't speak. I just shake my head and leave her sitting alone.
I have to get out of here. I have to... I don't know what to do... where can I go?
Flynn.
