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t w o

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I was sitting in my room, crying, thinking and looking at my daddy's portrait. It has been way too long since I've seen him. It hurts me to know that I will never see him again. I ran my fingers over his face. He was the daddy I always knew, blue eyes, blonde hair. He always wore those silly old blue jeans with the writing I put on it, 'Rogue loves you'. Then a teardrop fell on his shirt. Flashbacks ran through my head so fast it made me dizzy. They were the good old days when daddy was still around...still with me. Lightning flashed and thunder roared from outside, the rain was pounding the attic in. I curled up in my blanket, the old blue one that I've had forever, when a really loud thunder boomed and shook the attic, making it pop and creak. I began to hum a tune that my daddy always sang to me as a lullaby; it doesn't have a name but he always called it Rogue's Lullaby. I closed my eyes; the tears kept coming, but I kept thinking. Usually thinking helped, but not tonight. I cried myself to sleep.

I woke up to the sound of footsteps coming up the creaky stairs to my door. The door opened.

"Rogue? What are you doing?" His voice was gentle. It was my little brother, Ron. He wore old tennis shoes and blue jeans. He had dirty blonde short hair that half covered his face and black eyes. I hid my face under the blanket. "Go away! Leave me alone so I can sleep!" I heard him walk closer. Every footstep came with a creak or pop. There was a short moment of silence afterwards. "Is that dad?" I lay there motionless. "Of course it's dad. Leave me alone!" I don't like to cry in front of him. It makes me feel guilty, like he should cry too, but that's not what I want it to do. I wish he would leave. I sniffled and realized that would give away that I was crying. "Are you crying? What's wrong Rogue?" I was hoping he would have left before I sniffled. "No...just go away!" My voice was muffled that time. I was a little cranky because he would seem to always bother me lately when I was crying. "Fine!" I heard him close the door and walk down the creaky stairs, fading away to nothing. I heard it in his voice that he was a little hurt that I wouldn't talk to him. I was never mean to him before. That's just great. Do you see what you did Rogue? I cried myself back to sleep once more.

I woke up, early I knew because no one was up yet. I guessed around six in the morning. I sat up and grabbed my daddy's portrait from the nightstand and looked at it over and over again. Another flashback appeared showing me again my daddy's death, making me not want to think about him anymore. Fire and loud sirens...those noises or images won't ever leave. That would be impossible. I went back into tears after that. I noticed that sleep makes me stop crying. I couldn't help but crying myself back to sleep. It seems to happen a lot lately.

When I woke up this time, I heard noise from downstairs so I guessed about seven thirty or eight. I stepped onto the old wooden flooring of the attic off of my bed. My bed was the old kind, which never was comfortable no matter how you lay in it. The springs were worn out, so it was very lumpy. Every move I made, it made some sort of noise to go along with it. With every step I made, dust flew up around my feet, leaving footprints in its wake. The floor was uneven and broken in places. Every two boards, they stuck up higher than the previous ones. The walls were a little wet in places from leaks. The ceiling had cobwebs hanging from it. Every once in a while, the black spider about the size of my thumbnail came out onto it's webbing over in one dark corner. I opened the door when I got to it and hopped over a small hole onto the first step. I closed the door behind me and walked down the steps to the kitchen. The living room was between the kitchen and the hallway. There was a small old television set in the corner and a worn out couch over on the opposite wall.

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