Begin Again [A Haylor Fanfic]

Chapter 4

England is amazing. Seeing the boys concert tonight, wish you were here. xx

I pressed ‘send’ on the text to Sophie, and continued to get ready for the day ahead. I had woken up feeling refreshed and much more awake, but that didn’t stop me from walking downstairs to the Starbucks next door to the hotel to grab my favourite coffee, an iced caramel latte. When I had arrived back at the hotel, the receptionist had given me a backstage ‘all access’ pass to One Direction’s concert tonight. She also proceeded to tell me that a driver would be here to pick me up at 6pm; I had just nodded and thanked her before heading back up to my room.

Ever since arriving in the UK the night before, I had been on writing high. The lyrics just kept coming to me, and every time a new idea popped into my head, I had to write it down. I took my writing notebook everywhere; it would be impossible to keep count of the amount of times I had to stop in the middle of doing something to jot down some lines to a possible song. My singing and song writing was a part of me that few people knew about.

It was around 2pm when I decided I needed something to wear to the concert tonight. It was also after I had emptied the entire contents of my suitcase onto the bedroom floor. In some ways, I was a typical girl. So I threw on a cardigan and some jeans and headed down the street and into the nearest boutique. Searching through the racks of clothes, I found myself picking up a lavender dress to try on. Needless to say, it fit perfectly. It was a V-neck, backless dress that flowed down from the waist and hit just above the knee. I had to have it.

The afternoon went by quickly, and before I knew it I was putting the finishing touches on my make-up and slipping into my dress. I had been thinking about Harry and how lovely he had been to me last night. But my guard was up again and I was thinking much more clearly with the much needed sleep and coffee fix, so I wasn’t certain as to what tonight would bring. All I knew was as I slipped into my silver heels and looked in the mirror at my finished look, I felt confident and ready to take on whatever the night would throw at me.

I had been backstage at the venue for about half an hour now with no sign of Harry, or any of the boys for that matter. Not to mention there was a food table only a meter away from where I was sitting which looked, very, very tempting. I hoped Harry would turn up soon, I was getting impatient quickly. I decided to go for a wander and somehow ended up in the actual arena, walking up and down the aisles as I took in how big Hammersmith Apollo really was. Not to mention they had just announced their stadium tour. It wasn’t until fans started piling in that I decided it was time to sneak backstage. I was hoping to see Harry before they went on, it was weird that only a week ago I couldn’t stand the guy and now I was starting to grow friendly towards him. So many thoughts were going through my head that I didn’t even realize I had stumbled across the boy’s dressing rooms, all next to each other. I took no time in finding Harry’s and knocking on the door, hearing a deep, familiar voice invite me in.

Harry turned around as the door creaked open, and the smile just kept growing on his face as I walked towards him. “Taylor, erm… hi!” He looked so nervous as he spoke, and that was making me nervous. I sat down next to him on the couch, smiling over at him.

“Hey Styles. I’ve been looking for you, way to ditch a girl, huh?” I was hoping to lighten the mood, and as he chuckled, I could see he was becoming much more relaxed.

“Yeah, sorry about that. I got held up at the meet and greet. I had my assistant watching out for you, but I, ugh… she’s kinda got a thing for me so I doubt she would have told me if she had seen a pretty girl like you.” I blushed a little when those words came out of his mouth. I never blushed.

I was quick to change the subject, looking over to the table in front of the mirror that had numerous hair products sitting on it. I laughed, bounding up from the couch to take a look. “Don’t tell me that the one and only Harry Styles uses this many hair products to tame that iconic hairdo?” I held up a few of the products, not even sure of what they were myself. I really didn’t want to like him. He was supposed to be this bad boy with a reputation for dating too many girls. But right now, I was starting to form a whole different opinion of him.

Harry didn’t even have time to reply when the stage manager barged into the room.

“Harry, you’re on in five.”

He sighed, standing up to follow the stage manager. He looked back at me, a smirk on his face. “Well are you coming or not?” He asked me. I stood for a second, before nodding, following him as he met up with the other four boys just behind the exit to the stage. I wasn’t sure if they remembered me, but the way they teased Harry about me (they were obviously trying to be subtle but failed) made me believe otherwise.

I smiled and bit my lip as I watched Harry head towards the stage, and as the four boys ran onto the stage, Harry stopped and turned around, looked at me and said, “You look beautiful, by the way.” I was glad I didn’t have time to reply to that, because within the next couple of seconds he was on stage, opening up with ‘What Makes You Beautiful’.

I had watched the whole show from the floor area. Once again, the screaming fans weren’t exactly pleasant, but somehow I felt like I had to stay for Harry. And I had to admit, seeing them perform a second time wasn’t too horrible.

I found myself swaying along to the music, enjoying myself as I watched the boys do their thing. The concert was almost over, and after the boys had finished singing ‘Kiss You’ they were all given stools and guitars, all but Harry, who sat with a microphone in his hand. He looked into the crowd, and his eyes met mine. I could tell he was happy to see me.

“Thanks again for coming out tonight, guys. It means the world to us. There’s actually someone pretty special in the audience tonight that I have the pleasure of spending the next week with. I’d like to dedicate this next song to her, she knows who she is.” Harry finished his speech, and there was no doubt I was the girl he was talking about. Zayn and Niall started strumming their guitars, with Louis and Liam joining in, before Harry started singing ‘One Thing’.

It was in that moment I freaked out. This was moving way too fast. I tried not to listen to the lyrics, but it was hard not to.

Get out, get out, get out of my head, and fall into my arms instead.

I had to get out of there. The crowd was singing along, thousands of people all singing those lyrics Harry was singing to me. It was too much. I bolted for the closest exit backstage, running through the corridors as fast as I could run with heels on. I knew this wasn’t going to work unless I lost the heels, so I quickly took them off, and with a heel in each hand, I got out of the venue, so relieved when I saw the night sky. It had been raining, and the streetlights made the street glow. There was a certain beauty about it; I decided to walk back to the hotel, hoping it would start raining and wash away my fear. I had been hurt way too many times before; I had a whole book of songs I had written, heartbreak after heartbreak. I knew I was the problem. As soon as a guy started to get close to me, I freaked out. Or I would fall too soon, and scare them off.

Either way, I definitely wasn’t lucky in love.