Loving Rain (Watty Awards 2011)

Chapter 9 - The Loneliness

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Loving Rain - Ch. 9

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               When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was the stiffness in my neck and the pain in my back. I twirled my head around my neck, trying to release some tension, but accidently smacked the back of it on something hard. My immediate reaction was to reach up to hold it, like anyone does when they feel pain.

               My hands wouldn’t budge. What was going on? Then I felt the cold metal cut in a little bit deeper.

               Oh. Now I remember.

               I tried to adjust my eyes to the darkness of the room, but there was no getting used to this kind of deep, complete lack of light. I couldn’t find a single window or crack through the stone wall of the room. What room was this, anyway? I had never seen it before on any of the tours Alan gave me…

               Of course you wouldn’t have, I told myself. It’s not like Alan would walk me into a room and say, “And this, my dear Rain, is the place in which I will lock you up. On the night of your birthday. Right after I propose to you and tell you I love you.”

               No, he wouldn’t do that at all.

               My head was starting to ache because of the pain. I closed my eyes, trying to concentrate on letting the pain leave my body, willing it to leave. And it wasn’t like having my eyes closed was really hindering my ability to see. I tried to force all thoughts away from my mind so that stress wouldn’t increase the buildup of tension I was feeling, but it was hopeless.

               Why had Alan done this?

               Did I make him angry?

               Did I do something wrong?

               And the thought that didn’t leave, no matter how much I wanted it to: is this how he’s going to treat me when we’re married?

               Because of course we’d still get married. He didn’t have any other options. He had already admitted that he was shocked that I could look through his curse, and he didn’t have any hope of finding anyone else with the ability to look into his heart and understand it. Besides, he said he loved me.

               And saying you love someone with THAT look in your eyes, the look that Alan had when he said it, means that you’re not lying. Means that you can’t be lying. …Right?

               That was when his eyes popped into my thoughts. The deep, penetrating blue that everyone always talks about wanting to see in the eyes of their lover. The kind they write books about; the kind that nobody can get out of their head. And, apparently, I wasn’t an exception to the excessive number of people haunted by that kind of blue eyes, because when I finally opened mine, they were the only thing I could see in the darkness. Like they were right there in front of me. Like Alan was just sitting there waiting for me to fall into his arms.