Chapter Nine

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"Say it! Say you love boys!" Doctor Higgins gripped Polly's shoulders, shaking her back and forth. Her eyes were wide, terrified, but most of all, defiant.

"No." Her voice was cold, calculating, ready to fight. She'd only been there for a few days, but already Doctor Higgins had spent more time on her than her own roommate, who claimed that she'd been in there for months.

Doctor Higgins had a strange fascination with her. Polly could feel it in her heavy stare, and in the way he never let her out of his sight. There was something about him that told Polly he needed something from her. Something far more important than what her parents wanted.

She didn't know what it was, though.

"Polly, dear Polly. Such a beautiful girl like you can't possibly like girls. It's wrong. It's not how we love, darling. Do we have to go back to the tapes?"

She shook her head no. "Why do you think showing me those are a good idea? Why would I ever want to watch those?"

Doctor Higgins looked at her with dark eyes. His hands traveled from her shoulders up to her face, cupping it tenderly. "Oh, Polly, there is a lot you do not understand. I am here to help you. I am here because your parents sent you to me. Don't you think it would be so much easier to just comply and do as I say?"

She wanted to spit in her face. She wanted to kick his shins.

Instead, she nodded. She saw no other choice, honestly. Her parents were convinced there was something wrong with her. Doctor Higgins was hired to break her bones and then rearrange them so they were just like everyone else's bones.

She didn't belong here. She shut her eyes tight, dreaming of a world where she was normal. Dreaming of a place where she wasn't an outsider. She wanted it so badly it hurt.

"Polly, open your eyes." And she did as she was told, looking at Doctor Higgins. In that moment, he looked young, like he wasn't a priest. Like he wasn't there to torture her. He looked like a normal boy his age, only he didn't belong here, not at all. He looked like he belonged in college perhaps, maybe even a little out of college in a real job. Not doing this, harassing children. Locking them away at a camp for queers.

He looked like he didn't want to be here, either. He looked completely worn out and tired, like his life wasn't his own. And for a moment, Polly imagined that Doctor Higgins was like her, in a sense. That he was suffering like she was, only in a different way. Because as she looked into his tired eyes and his hollow cheeks and the bags under his eyes, she imagined he was lost and trapped, just like she was.

It was a fleeting thought, though, because his eyes hardened the moment there was a knock on the door. Like a switch had been flipped, and suddenly, he was back in the room with her. Back to being the man she knew him to be.

"What is it?" He snarled, his grip on Polly's face hard. Harder than before - hard enough to cause her cheeks to ache as his fingers dug into the soft flesh there.

"Patient 14 is deranged. She is demanding to see you-"

"Open up! Open this door right now you filthy, motherfucking assho-"

It was silent after that, and Doctor Higgins was still. There was a bang outside of the door, then a struggle. Then, a cry.

Doctor Higgins let Polly go and he moved to the door, opening it. The moment he did, Polly's room mate flew in. She sent a disgusted look at Polly, then kicked the door closed, locking out the man who had been there, trying to restrain her.

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