Christina's POV:
I wake up and there's dried tears on my cheek. I guess I cried myself to sleep last night. I don't want a relationship anymore if it's going to be like this all the time.
I get up and brush my teeth/ hair. Then I go to the kitchen and make coffee.
"Hey" cal scares me
I don't reply I just drink my coffee.
"I'm going to Luke's house and staying there" he says
"Ok" I don't turn around
"Are we still together?" He asks
"Ask yourself" I scoff
"I guess that's a no" he grabs his things
I try to hide my tears. I'm trembling inside. I'm not sure if he meant anything that he said last night but I'm not even going to try stopping him from leaving. To be honest I need some space anyways. I think we both do.
"Bye" he says before leaving
I finally let of my anger and tears. I yell and scream but I'm not relieved. This is real life. It's not a story you would read about a couple break up. I don't know what to do anymore. There's a hole in my heart and I want it to be filled.
"My mom always told me to chose wisely, I don't think I was wise when I chose you" I type in Twitter
I know that after I send this I will get questions. I won't know what to reply only because I most likely won't know the answer myself. I send the tweet and immediately people start to question. I don't blame them. I would want answers to.
I'm guessing Calum saw the tweet since he tweeted right after, saying:
"What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how its suppose to be"
It's hard to answer the question "what's wrong?" When nothing's right. I wish they knew that. I don't want to start drama with the 5sosfam because I know they will take Calum's side and not mine and I understand why. We were just two teenagers who thought we were in love. I'm a fool. I thought I was in love.
I decide to sleep knowing that is what I need right now.
-
6:32pm
I slept for a long time and I'm glad I did.
Calum's POV:
I fucked up bad this time and I know I did. But I need a break. Christina tweeted and I tweeted back. I can't say that what she said didn't hurt me. The fans are going crazy trying to figure out what's happening. I feel bad for not answering them back and telling them what's going on because they deserve to know and not be left clueless but I don't know what to say. I can't something that I'm not positive about.
I'm currently at Luke's house, watching a football game.
"Want a beer?" Luke asks
"That's the last thing I need right now" I laugh
"Don't be so sappy about this" he says
"I can't help it!" He throw my hands in the air
"Well now that your single, you can go to the club all the time with me" he shoves my shoulder
"Seriously" I say
"Come on!! You can't just sit here all day till she comes back to you" he stated
"Fuck it, lets go" I race to the door
I'll probably regret this but I'm not regretting it now.
Christina's POV:
I follow 5sos update accounts and I usually look in there to see what they are up to and I decide to do that now.
"Calum and Luke seen arriving at the bailout bar in Los Angles" the owner posts
Why am I not fucking surprised that he would go to a club. Probably to fuck girls to make him feel better. Why do I keep thinking about him? I ask myself. He clearly isn't hurting like I am.
-
Next day
Today I'm going to be productive. I feel so disgusting and lazy since I've been doing nothing but crying and sitting around. I decide on going shopping. Shopping makes me happy.
-
I've bought a crap ton of stuff already and I got here about 20 minutes ago. This shows that I have a shopping addiction. I buy clothes even though my closet is to full to fit anymore stuff. But I don't care. I want clothes and that's it.
__________________________
I feel aesthetic and sad af!
Social media's:
Instagram:
@grandehood or
@champagnetinaa
Twitter:
@cthobsession or
@christinaxqveen
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