Forgotten [Jian AU (Boyxboy)]

Preface

I never wanted to experience this. I thought we were going to last forever, that we wouldn't break up. And I'm sure we wouldn't if he could stay with his dad.

And he, of course, couldn't. When his parents divorced, he had to move to LA with his mom. From New York to LA. In that moment, I was sure I wouldnt,' see him ever again. 

We were dating for two years, since I was thirteen and he was my first big love, my first in everything. My first kiss, my first french kiss, my first - yeah I am gonna say it - hand job and so on...

No, we never went all the way because I was too young and he was too scared and I was glad that he didn't force me to do it... But that's a different story. Story I may tell another time. Who knows.

And here I am, saying goodbye. If I could, i would never let him go. And he knows.

"We'll  meet again, I promise. Okay love?" he whispers and kisses my cheek. His mom is watching us and it makes me really uncomfortable.

"But how? You'll be so far away and you'll find someone better and forget me." I frown and look at the ground. "I don't want you to forget me, Jc. Promise me you won't forgive me."

Jc smiles sadly and in that moment, I know. I can see it in his eyes. He can't promise. He would love to but can't. We're never gonna see eachother ever again, so why would he still think of me, right?

"You know what? It's okay. Don't have to." He opens his mouth to say something but i quickly kiss him to shut him up. "Shh. It's fine. Just... thank you."

He looks confused. "What for?"

"For those two amazing years we spent together, silly." I smile and swallow my cries. He can't see me cry. Not now.

"Kian." he kisses my forehead. "We will be fine."

Hah, fine. He's moving so far away from me, but we "will be fine".

We kiss for the last time and he hugs me tightly. Knowing, that this is the last hug he will ever give me makes me weak in my knees.

Then he gets inside his mom's car and waves at me.  I am not able to do anything else than wave back and hold back tears.

Maybe I am overreacting but I really loved him, hell I still do. And losing him, that is just unbearable.

Who will help me with my homework? Who will be with me through my anxiety attacks? 

I watch him leave and then, when I'm sure he can't see me anymore, I start crying.

***

the first few days are rough. I still get "Good morning" texts from him, but the texting sucks, since I am three hours ahead. So when he wakes up, I'm already up. And when he texts me goodnigt, I'm sleeping. 

Though I should be glad it's only three hours difference. It could be much worse.

And well, mom and dad are glad I'm not with Jc anymore because "He had a bad influence on me" - they basically think he made me gay. Made me. MADE me. As if you can make someone change their sexuality. That is ridiculous. But whatever. They're happy now, completely blind to the fact that I am not happy at all. I miss him too much and it's been only a week.

To be completely honest, in that moment when his mom's car was leaving, I though I was never going to see him ever again. Like, never. But somewhere inside me, I still hoped I would, some day.

Little did I know what is really about to happen.

***

*AN* So here it is, my first ever Jian fanfiction. I'm pretty sure first few chapters will suck. But I'll try to get better soon, really :D If you wanna leave any kind of feedback, I'll be really happy. xx