Safe

I am pretty

I wake up this morning. I have never really gone to school. He never let us. So I get up to do my usual morning routine, which is cooking breakfast, while Lily sleeps a bit longer. But then I realize I am not at home, I am at Amelia's house. I go to her door. I knock, then I wait. She comes to the door her pretty brown waves are in a messy ponytail. She looks exhausted.

"I was just wondering, if you wanted me to cook breakfast for you too."

"Oh, no. I will do it. "

She walks down the stairs. I follow her. I guess I forgot after so many years of being an adult. That adults were supposed to take care of kids not the other way. We get to the bottom of the stairs. I follow Amelia left to kitchen. I sit at the table. I watch her get a bowl.

"You like pancakes, right?"

"Yes, are you sure I can't do anything?"

"Well, I suppose you can help. You are probably a better cook than me. "

She gets out all of the ingredients and some turkey bacon. I help her mix up all of the ingredients. Again she reminds me of my mother. We used to cook together. It was fun. It is fun. After the pancakes are done being mixed. We pour them onto the skillet. I watch the pancakes as she begins to fry the bacon. The aroma is delicious. When I was at home with him, cooking was my get away especially in the morning. He would be asleep. So I was free. I would get up at 6 am watch a bit of t.v. or read book for an hour. Then start on breakfast. I had fun cooking, singing, laughing at the t.v, while I cooked. It was what kept me going through everything.

Presently, we finished the breakfast. I went up stars to wake up Lily. She road on my back all the way to the kitchen. I sat her in a chair. I put a pancake on her plate and a peace of bacon. I put three pancakes and two slices of bacon on my plate. We eat ravenously. After we are done, I help collect the plates. I place them in the sink.

"What do you two usually do right about now?"

"Well, Lily plays in our room, and I do some school work."

"Well, We aren't going to do that. "

"Then, what are we going to do," I snap.

"What is something you have never done before?"

"I haven't been to the beach before."

"Then that's what we'll do. We'll go to lake Michigan. It is only a few hours away.You don't have swimsuits do you?"

"No."

"We'll buys some adorable bathing suits."

Amelia is so full of life energy it almost scared me. She runs around making sandwiches and getting everything ready for our fun beach afternoon. I think it will be great. I get Lily dressed and washed up. She is in her going to town dress. She has a pretty bow in her hair. The dress is a flowery sundress that I pair with sparkly sandals. He may not be a good father, but dad did buy us stuff. I get dressed. I put on a flowery dress. It was the dress that he would say I looked like mom in . I start to cry. It didn't bother me before, but it does now. I think how he would walk around me like a shark circling its prey. He would play with the thin noodle straps. His rough leathery hands place on my shoulders as he stood behind me. Telling me how beautiful I was. If things had been normal, if he hadn't hurt me. Maybe it would be a good memory, but now I remember all of it too well. I don't want to think about. I want to forget. I throw the dress in the garbage. I don't have to look at it again. I put on a different dress. I add a flower to my hair. This is better much better. I smile at my reflection in the bedroom mirror. I am pretty.

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I will try to post weekly with this until it is finished.