One Direction - Crackfics and One shots

Terrible Horrible Spoons!: Liam Payne Crackfic

Terrible Horrible Spoons!

I can't stand self-inserts. But it's quite funny making fun of them in crackfics. And after watching AAoOD2 with the spoon song, I just had to write this.

~Q

Synopsis: You save Liam Payne from a spoon, and he loves you forever.

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You're having a normal Saturday day. The sun is shining, and gosh, isn't it hot today? Or it could just be the fact that you're sitting outside a coffee shop and Liam Payne from One Direction happens to be sitting a few tables away, wearing a slightly revealing shirt. Not that you'd noticed, or even if you'd noticed you obviously don't care, because you know, all it is is Liam Payne from One Direction. No, you're just sitting here on your phone, casually wondering why wattpad is suddenly hosting a load of stories that seem really crackfic-like, when suddenly, you hear a deafening scream!

You look up to see Liam Payne on the floor, his head buried in his arms. Is that...a spoon on the table? How dare the people working give Liam James Payne a *spoon* to stir his drink with, what idiot doesn't know he has a morbid fear of them?  You angrily march inside, demanding to see the person who made him his drink, until you realise it probably makes sense to help him first. Let's just say you're feeling very, very nice today and you're going to help him.

Standing next to the table, you take two fingers, yes two and only two, pick up the spoon, and with all of your power you throw the spoon into the nearest bush! What you don't know is that the spoon will be discovered by a group of happy ants, who begin to worship the strange object which never dices or chops or smears. But that's not important to the story, no, not at all.

"You...you saved me!" You hear the sound waves from Liam's voice directing towards you. "And I don't even know your name."

He sees you debating whether or not to tell him your name. You choose to walk away, despite your heart telling you to stay. Had it been a dark night and you were wearing a mask to cover your face, then it perhaps would've been more mysterious.

"Wait! Will you tell me if I take you er...on a date?"

This time you listen to your heart and agree. After a lovely night, he asks you the same question again. You're still a bit hesitant to reply, but when you do, your name is like music to his ears.

"My name is [insert your name here]"

You truly had a beautiful name.