Soul Nate

Conflict and Recovery

AN

Dedicated to jazzo_spazzo because her comment was amazing :) thank you xx

So lately Nattie's been distant. He had been acting strange for a week. As in, he got hot chocolate at Starbucks (what the fuck?), had been replying with one syllambles words to any question. Considering he usually wouldn't shut up, it was concerning.

Another thing... my birthday was coming up. It was tomorrow, actually. I hadn't told any of them, I didn't want presents or god forbid a party.

I yawned, leaning my head against Nattie's chest and closing my eyes. "I'm tired."

"I know."

I stretched and forced myself up. "Are you going home tonight?"

"Yes."

See what I mean? Distant. I nodded and stood up. "Okay. Good night then."

"Night."

Well he was just chatty, wasn't he? I kissed his cheek and headed to my bedroom, curling into my little ball and closing my eyes...

**

My phone rang it's customary Nattie ringtone, which was Barlights. I picked it up and flipped it open. "Hello?"

"Hey. Can I come over?"

"Um, sure."

"Okay. See you in a few." He hung up.

I shook my head and got dressed. Wow, I was twenty... I didn't really feel different at all. Maybe later, I would.

I tamed my curls and got dressed and was eating cake as the doorbell rang. Nattie sat primly on the couch.

"Amy, we need to talk."

I sat down not as gracefully. "Okay."

He shifted. "I... I was wrong."

"About what?"

He sighed and stared at the ceiling. "I was wrong about my feelings for you."

I was a bit lost. "How so?"

"These past few weeks were nice.... but it was forced. I felt like I was spending time with Rachel or Emily."

I waited. "I just... I like you, but I don't like like you."

"Okay." There wasn't really much I could say to this. I took a bit of my cake so I wouldn't cry or something.

"What's the cake for?"

I shrugged, fighting back tears. "It's my birthday today."

His eyes widened. "Oh. I didn't know. I'm sorry, Amy-"

I held up my hand. "It's fine. But um, could you please leave?"

He nodded and slowly got up. "Bye."

"Bye." The door opened and closed and I collapsed against the couch. I wouldn't cry. And even though all I wanted to do was curl up in my bed and cry while playing Adele, I fought against that urge. But I definitely didn't want to do anything. So I decided on a compromise.

I got some ice cream and curled up on the couch to have a Criminal Minds marathon. Crime shows were riveting okay. And, fine, Spencer was pretty cute. But that's not the whole reason. Just a lot of it.

it was hard to believe, afterall the drama and fighting and everything, it was ended like that. Simple words, but so much power. Gone.

I ate my cappuchino ice cream and focused on not crying, not even one tear. I had a feeling if I started I might not be able to stop.