~JENNICA'S POV~
(THIRTEEN YEARS AGO...)
I don't like it here. The place smells like pee. "You'll be sleeping here." Mrs.Blasé said to me as I clutched my doll. I didn't say anything and she just left out. "Hey you...new kid." I saw a tall boy get up off of the bunk bed and stand next to me.
"Since your new here you have to listen to everything I say got it?" I say nothing. "Hey you stupid or something?" He poked my doll and I lost it. "Don't touch me!" I took the doll and hit him in the face. The blood came rushing out. "You crazy bitch." He went to slap me but I tackle him down and start beating him with the doll. "Jennica stop this!" My case worker grabbed me off of the boy. "Let me go! Let me go!!"
(FOSTER HOME 2)
I don't like the older girl...she looks at me funny. I think as I carry my doll. "She's a little rough around the edges. But she's fine as long as she's not bothered." My case worker says to Mrs. Leo. She looks at me and smiles.
"How about you go introduce yourself to the others." She reaches for me and I flinch. I move away from her and stand by myself in the living room. A girl who looked my age came up to me. "Hey, why do you have a bandage wrapped around you?" I say nothing as I pull my tank top closer to me. "You don't talk much...good. Marla will like you. She likes the quiet ones because they don't scream when she touches them." I say nothing...
Later that night I sat in bed while everyone was sleeping. "Pssst" I look and see the older girl creeping inside of the room. She looks around and spots me. "Fresh meat..." She whispered. I held onto my doll as she crept closer. I flinch when she moves my hair back.
"You're so pretty...my brother would have liked you..." She kneels in front of me and grabs my doll. "You won't be needing this." I glare at her and pounce on her. "Don't touch her! Don't touch me!" I went screaming. Marla was trying to claw me off but my grip on her hair was tight. I kept slamming her head on the hard floor ground. "Mrs. Leo! Jennica's hurting Marla!" No she was going to touch me. Mrs.Leo came in and dragged me off. She slapped me and I pushed her into the window. "Don't touch me!"
"Mrs.Leo she's a monster. A little monster." That what I am...I am a little monster.
(FOSTER HOME 3)
They took my doll and threw it away. They said I was too old to have it. I am now seven... I don't like it here. The kids whisper about me.
"Did you see those scars?"
"I bet she did that to herself."
"She's ugly."
I am ugly...I am the little monster. "Jennica try not to cause problems here okay?" I look at the floor. Too many people are in here...I don't want to be here. I flinch when a man comes in the house. "Well. Mom who's she?" The woman smiles at the man. "Richard, this is Jennica. She's going to be staying with us for a while. So take her outside with the others to play." The man hold out his hands and I shut my eyes. Don't hit me...
I was on the porch as Richard tried to make conversation with me. "So...how'd you get those scars?" I look off into the distance and see a boy getting pushed around by another boy. I glare and stand up. I walk over to them.
"You better bring more cookies next time stupid dick." I hear the boy say. He looks at me and scoffs. "What do you want freak?" I say nothing and hold out my hand for the cookies. "What you want these? Hmm I might give them to you since your cute. But first show me your scars." He goes to touch my shirt and I slap his hand away. "That hurt. You little fuck." He goes to push me but I grab his shirt and head bud him. I push him and start wailing on him. I didn't last there for an hour.
In the fourth foster home the girl took my snack...so I gave her a bloody nose with a skateboard...
(FOSTER HOME 5)
This is weird... Two men together? It was my 9th birthday today and no one cared. "Jennica this is Henry and Matthew Davis. Please behave or you're going to be a ward of the state again." I know the drill. She leaves and I stand in the kitchen. "Do you want anything to eat?" Henry asked me.
I shook my head and held on to the hem of my jacket. "Come take your jacket off." As Mathew reached for me I flinch and stand back. "The poor girl is scared Matt. Just leave her for now." Henry smiles at me. I slowly walk to the room they said was mine.
It...was big. It didn't smell. They didn't have mean children here. My room. "Jennica? Can you please come here a second?" What did I do? Don't hit me. I peek into the living room and see them holding a cupcake. "Your case worker said that today was your birthday..." I look between them. Why are they being nice to me? I'm a monster...I'm ugly...
Later that night I woke up screaming. Mommy don't go I'll be good please don't go. "Jennica, are you alright?" Matthew touched my arm and I lost it. "Don't touch me! Don't touch me!" I scoot back and rock back an forth mumbling that I'm a monster. "Jennica, you're not a monster...who told you that you were?" I glare at him. Is he blind? Can't he see I'm a monster? I turn to him and show him my back. "Dear God, you poor thing." He pulled me into a hug and I felt...warm. "You're a beautiful girl. You hear me you're beautiful." Am I...am I beautiful?
I was with them for a while. I got angry and punched a wall. Just because I wanted to. They bought me a guitar. I'm not good. But Henry says channel my anger into music. I sat in my room teaching myself how to play the guitar as I sung my moms song black lipstick. I sound like her when I sing. I don't hate her...I love my mom...mommy why didn't you take me home?
I have been here for about seven years. I can't imagine life with out them. A new group came out. They call themselves One Direction. They're all handsome. But I like the curly haired one. His hair is like mine. But my hair is more curly....Harry Styles. I want to meet them one day. But that's impossible...I'm just a fan. Just like the rest. I'll never meet them. And I'll never meet Harry Styles. "Dream big...little dreamer...chase your dreams...and catch them..." I sing to the camera. And later post it on youtube...
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**AS YOU SEE JENNICA WAS A SCARED GIRL WITH ANGER PROBLEMS...SO NOW YOU KNOW...WHAT SHE'S BEEN THROUGH. DO YOU ACCEPT HER SCARS? DO YOU STILL LIKE JENNICA SPRINGER? DONT FORGET TO COMMENT AND VOTE...happy READING LITTLE DREAMERS<3**
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