I'm second time because the first time I was an idiot and deleted it.
Trigger Warning: this chapters and a few more will contain self harm.
Stay safe and
I love you lots
~~~~~~
Jessica pov
I sat in art class watching the teacher give us a lesson on the history of yellow. A paper lands on my desk and looked back to see Denis mouth 'Read it."
I turned around and opened the paper.
'Hey, I was wondering what you and Chris doing during thanks giving break' I read it then wrote. 'I'm going to my parents and Chris with his parents to Angelo's. Why?'
I tosted it back to him and heard him yell "Ow!!!" which caused the class to chuckle.
"Denis, please quiet down. Now for your thanks giving break project" Ms. LaRen said, "You have to draw a place that makes you feel at peace."
Ring Ring
"Jessica please stay, I need a word with you." Ms. LaRen said as I packed my bag.
"I'll wait for you outside." Denis said with Gabriella behind him. I walked to the front near her desk.
"Here. I got you the pamphlet and the schools e-mail."
"Thank you." I said taking the pamphlet, with the sticky note, with the email on it.
"On The back of the note I put in by when you have to turn in your masterpiece or entry." Ms. LaRen said, "don't worry it's not until next year but you can leave after this year, they'll let you do senior year over there then start college right away."
"I will definitely think about that, thank you." I said hugging her then walked out to see Dennis, Gabriella, Cameron, and Chris.
"What took so long?" Denis asked
"She gave me the pamphlet and e-mail for that school." I said giving Chris a hug and a kiss.
"What school?" Chris asked
"Art School of England, she also told me that I could leave after junior year and finish my senior year over there then start college."
"But your not." Chris said
"I told her I'd think about it." I said quietly.
"But your not leaving" Chris said raising his voice.
"No" I said with fear in my voice.
"Let's go eat." Denis said causing us to walk. Chris put his arm over my shoulders.
Dennis and Cameron linked hands, as Gabriella walk next to them. They looked at me with a 'I'm sorry face' which caused me to look down.
-
Threw lunch I didn't talk just listened to the conversations around me. Denis whispered something in Ricky's ear, causing him to look at me.
-
In class, I didn't talk and wasn't forced because the teacher wasn't there. I think the girls new because they didn't try to get a word out of me.
-
Walking home, didn't talk, but Tyler and Gabriella watched me.
-
Once at home, I went to my room, locked the door and cried. Sitting on my bed and pulled my knees to my chest and cried into them.
Ricky pov
I sat outside Jessica's door with my knees to my chest. A tear made its way down my cheek.
"Why is a beautiful boyfriend crying"
I looked up to see Ryan looking back at me. Ryan took a seat next to me then sighed.
"Why is she crying?" Ryan asked placing his arm over my shoulders.
"Chris isn't letting her live her dreams." I said moving my head to his shoulder.
"How?" Ryan asked
"She could finish senior year over in England." I said
"Think about it this way. Do you want her to be gone."
"No but if its for her future. Yes" I said looking into Ryan's eyes
"This is why I love you." Ryan said, then his eyes went wide.
'He loves me'
"I'm sorry, I um, um if you don't want to move um fa-" I cut him off with my lips. After pulling away, "I love you too." I said as we both rested our foreheads on each other's.
"Beautiful."
We pulled away and looked back at the door. Just was sitting on the opposite side of the door, listening to us.
Jessica pov
"Beautiful." I whispered threw the door.
Getting up and walking to my dresser. I hope in the first drawer and searched but couldn't find it. So I went to my back.
Dropping to the floor near my bed and found the box. I put it under and opened it.
"Found we." I pulled it out and held it to my face. "Where's the other half." I said pulling them out as well.
"Hello old friends." I said then moved it to my wrist.
Closing my eyes and pushing it into my skin, opening my eyes to the blood flow out.
"Relief."
I said the tears made their way out of my eye. After soaking of the pain I made more slashes the cross my arms.
"Relief."
I repeated over and over again after every slash.
~~~~
Self harm is no joke
Trust me I've been threw it
If you know someone who is going threw this don't make them do it alone.
So you're there and you care for them
Ashley
