Saving Grace

Chapter Nine. // Produce Closet.

Chapter Nine. // Produce Closet.

"Do you honestly think that's a smart idea?" I grimace, looking at my best friend from across the table. She decided today would be a great day to hang out. I've recently found out that 'hanging out' means talking about her dysfunctional sex life. But I guess I've known that sense she lost her virginity at the end of Freshman year and hasn't gone a month without having sex once sense.

The longest I've gone without having sex after losing my precious pure flower in eighth grade was almost a year. A little over ten months. It was that long time period where boys were the most disgusting things in the world an all they had to offer was heart ache and their dicks. I spent a lot of time alone those ten months but then I met this guy at a party and he reminded me just why we kept guys around. They have really nice dicks that we can put between our legs whenever we fucking please.

Needless to say, I can't remember his face or his name, but I remember just how nice it felt after so long.

"Of course I do!" Amanda yells, grinning, "I'm going to just make sure to take my birth control correctly, everyday and he has to wear two condoms."

I roll my eyes, "yes! But he's gotten two girls pregnant and has had like a thousand pregnancy scares."

Amanda puckers her lips, "oh please, the only reason he's had that many scares is because he has had that many opportunities." She takes a long sip of her coffee, "which means a lot of sex, a lot of sex means a lot of experience. Which means he's probably pretty fucking good in bed!" She yells a little too loud in a  small, local family cafe. I try to avoid eye contact with the mother glaring at me, holding her five year old really close to her.

"Well, yeah. But still, it's like he only has to have sex once to get four chicks pregnant." I mutter in a lower tone so judgmental people around us can't hear.

Amanda rolls her eyes, "that's impossible."

I scoff, "obviously, dumb ass. But you know what I mean. He's like One Shot Ricky or something."

"His name's Erik." Amanda comments flatly, sending me a scowl.

I laugh, shaking my head, "fine. Do what you want. But I want to be the god-mother." I say, pointing to her with authority.

She licks her lips, nodding, "obviously. Who else could I choose, Ryan?"

"No, he'd probably be crying way too hard to even comprehend what you're saying."

"It's not my fault everyone who comes with in a twenty foot radius falls in love with me."

"That's not true. Luke didn't fall in love with you."

Luke is one of Mandy's most recent flings. He was super into her but wanted to treasure her. He didn't want to have sex yet and that set alarms off in Mandy's head. So she ran. He didn't chase her like she expect. He had moved on and had a new girlfriend two days later. But she actually liked him and now she's paying the price for running off before the good stuff could happen.

Mandy gasps, "how dare you say his name in my presence." She glares at me. "That dip shit isn't worth either of our time. I refuse to give him even one percent of my brain capacity."

"Well, obviously not. Because that's all you have."

"Wow, you're a bitch today."

I shrug, "it's what I do." I take a sip of my ice tea before saying, "but in all seriousness. Luke never did anything wrong. He literally just told you he didn't want to sleep with you and you wrote him off."

"Well, yeah. But he had a new chick the next day. Plus, you can't have a relationship without sex."

I roll my eyes. "Yes. Yes, you can. Because we have a relationship and I don't screw you every Thursday night on schedule." Amanda grunts but I keep lecturing her. "Taking it slow with someone you actually want to be with; keeps it fun. Blow jobs aren't as fun once you've already gone all the way and you can't change it."