Me and You

Sally

i guess i should start at the beginning i am ten years old and i just come home from school i had a good day we did painting today i love painting ive been told i have a talent for it i like painting what is in my head and how im feeling, anyway i am come home and mum and dad are sitting on the sofa i smile at them but they look sad mum looks like she has been crying, i didnt understand were they splitting up? were we moving? i sat my bag down on the floor by the door and walked over to them the walk over to them seemed long but its not really its only a few yards away but this time it seemed to go on forever. i just sat on the floor in front of them looking at there sad faces i had never seen  my dad sad before he was always such a happy soul he got up everyday at 6am for work, has a shower i even here him sing sometimes his favourite song is wouldnt it be nice by the beach boys, he then cleans his teeth puts on his suit has coffee and breakfast and then says goodbye. i looked at him now and he looked white whiter than id ever seen anyone before like he had seen a ghost i go to put my hand on his but he pulls mine away and he starts crying again. Then mum looks at me and starts talking "Sweetheart we have some bad news to tell you, mummy hasnt been feeling well lately" yes i knew this mum had been very sick lately she would be sick every morning she hadnt been to work in a week, mum had a very high powered job she wears this pin suit that makes her look like a million dollars with her blonde curls red lipstick and red shoes, i looked at her and thought she is beautiful my mum but this time as i looked at her her curls didnt look in shape she wasnt wearing lipstick "mummy had to go to the drs today and im afraid its not good news..i have cancer sweetheart and im afraid the doctor cant do anything more for me" i sat there in silence taking the words in that my mother has just told me..what was cancer? what does she mean there is nothing the dr can do..all these questions and i couldnt  say them out loud. "Sweetheart we know this is a shock to you its a shock to us as well we love you so much darling " what was my mum saying? "mum i love you too" that was all i could say i went to my room trying to understand what had just happened. 

"sweetheart are you asleep?" mum was at my door, she crept in and sat on my bed i didnt want to move "sweetheart you can pretend your asleep all you want but i know you are not, i know this is hard darling, mummy has been sick for  a while now" "mum ..what is cancer? and what do you mean the dr cant do anything for you?" she put her arms around me and  i crept on her lap i used to do this as a small child whenever i cried mummy would tell me to sit on her lap and she would cuddle me and sing to me to make it all better, i would sit there with my eyes closed and take in mums amazing smell i loved her perfume and i kept thinking i cant wait to wear this when im older. "darling, its something a lot of people get, its a disease that some can get treatment for but when it gets bad sometimes there is nothing they can do for you, mummy has had this for a while now and because mummy didnt know she had it its got worse and now there is nothing they can do for me just make me comfortable" she hugged me tighter and whispered i love you "i love you too mummy" 

after that mummy got sicker and sicker she would just stay in bed, i remember going in there and seeing her beautiful blonde curls on the floor, she just said it happens, she started not looking like my mum anymore she looked like a ghost i longed to crawl on her lap and have her sing to me but i didnt want to hurt her, it wasnt fair why did my mum have to get sick? i herd dad come the stairs he didnt like me looking at mum while she was sick, it must be so hard for him they were childhood sweethearts mummy said she loved him right from the moment she saw him  it all seemed so romantic they got married got good jobs big house and then had me, i looked at my daddy he had a tray in his hand with mummies medicine and some soup that she liked daddy looked tired i listened through the door at then talking "How are we going to tell her darling? " i herd my mum say "how can you tell a ten year old your mother is going to die?" DIE DIE....what? no mummy!!!!! ....