Saving Riley

Chapter 16- The Aftermath

I think I probably stood and stared for a good few minutes, taking in what I'd just heard. Surely this was a bad dream. Of course it wasn't, this was the car crash that was my life. So I did what any broken hearted girl would do, I turned tail and ran. I ran through the sea of staring faces, the hallway had been silent. All eagerly listening in on the latest drama caused by our resident whore, Tiffany being the whore. I burst through the double doors and ran past the people on the stairs that hadn't yet heard the latest news and made a dash to my car. I hadn't yet cried and I wouldn't until I was out of this god forsaken place, where no one I knew would witness my breaking down. God I'd been such a fool. Like he would ever be interested in me. I wasn't skinny, my tummy wasn't flat. I was awkward and sometimes found it hard to keep my temper. I wasn't what I'd call pretty. Tiffany for all her slutiness what pretty, she had long shiny hair, manicured nails. She was tall and had les for days, I was short. I was nothing, always had been, always will be. Plain and simple. This wasn't new information to me, I'd always known my downfalls, I'd just forgotten them and put them aside to bask in the joy of being in love for the first time, knowing someone wanted me for me despite my flaws. What a fucking joke that had been. He had played me and he'd played me well. I was heartbroken. The pain in my chest was indescribable.

I'd lost track of where I was driving and pulled up at a beach in the next town over, I hadn't been to a beach since Adam died, I'd always avoided it, now I felt like I needed my big brother, If he'd been here now. Hunter would be in pain already and Adam would be feeding me endless amount of Ben and Jerry's.

It was grey and overcast, the loud in the sky looking as dark as I felt, I took off my high tops and spongebob socks and let my toes sink into the soft sand I could see a few huge rocks which I made my way over to, pulling my legs up to my chest and wrapping my arms tightly around them I cried. Big fat tears slowly made their way down my cheeks, only to roll over the exposed skin on my arms, I wished I'd put my hoodie on I was cold. After a while my eyes started to drop and I curled into a ball and let sleep take over.

When I woke it was pitch black outside and it was raining hard, I was shivering, I pulled my socks and shoes back on and pulled myself to my feet and slowly made my way back to my car. I plugged my mp3 into the socket in my car and let the music take over. I drove back home. Alex was outside on the porch, he looked so worried and angry, the anger soon disappeared when I stepped out of the car and he took one look at my face, mascara staining my cheeks, hair dishevelled. One brother maybe gone, but I still had one left and I needed him.

'What happened, I got a call from the school asking why you didn't show up today?' he pulled my into his chest wrapping his arms around me. Letting me cry into his chest.

'I did go, but people were staring and when I made my way to my locker, Hunter was there with Tiffany, he was kissing her, it was all a bet Alex' my voice broke 'he just wanted to have sex with me, to see how easy I was, he's been with her the whole time. I'm such a fucking idiot.'

I could feel Alex shaking with anger 'Do you want me to go break his face? Adam would have done that right?'.

'I love you Alex, you don't have to break his face, I just want to forget he ever existed, can we just go to bed, I'm sorry I worried you.' Kissing his chest I made my way to my room and let the tears flow. I made my way to my bed and knelt and looked under, pulling out the bottle I'd had stashed here for a few months I leant against the wall and took a long drink, I could feel the numbness setting in, my head feeling pleasantly lighter. I continued until I passed out.

I woke up with the pounding in my head seemingly getting louder and louder. Getting showered and dressed in anything I could find I pulled my slouchy hat on and quickly put my thick eyeliner, dark blue eyeshadow and mascara on. I grabbed my bag and avoided breakfast. I did look in the cupboards and pulled out a half bottle of vodka and tipped it into a water bottle, Alex had already gone to work so I didn't need to worry about hiding what I as doing. I hid all the evidence in the neighbours rubbish bin and made my way to my car.