Camilla's POV
I open my eyes from a nap. I unplugged my earphones from my ears and rub my eyes. I threw my legs to the side and stood up. I touched my head rubbing it in small circles cause of how light headed I felt.
I went to the bathroom to rinse my dry mouth. I walked back to my bedroom. I still felt tired. I didn't sleep last night. I couldn't sleep last night. I was so tired and I just took a 1 hour nap. Its not enough for me.
I knew exactly why I couldn't sleep. The memories always rush through my head every night. When it comes, I don't feel like sleeping. I can't sleep knowing that I-
My phone rang which interrupted my self talk. It was him. My boyfriend. Shawn.
S- hey
C- hey
S- so I was thinking maybe I can come to your house and we can watch a movie or something?
C- uhh, I mean, I'm really tired and I really want to sleep more.
S- I'll come sleep with you, I'll be there to comfort you
C- Shaw-
S- I'm on my way
He hangs up. I put my phone down. I sigh. Do I really deserve him? Does he know? Will he know? Will he ever forgive me?
These thoughts. These feelings. This guilt, runs through my head over and over. They make me remember, they haunt me.
When I see his face it makes me crazy. Crazy that he doesn't know. Crazy that he shows respect and I show nothing. He loves me in every way. He's sweet, caring, so loving and I just hurt him. He doesn't know. He will know. Not now though.
I sat down on my bed looking completely at nothing. I stayed like that for 10 minutes. I hear a knock from downstairs. My head turns to my bedroom door. My hands on bed sheets takes a tight grip before I stood up.
I walked towards my door and down the stairs.
Fake smile. I thought.
I walk towards my door and open it revealing the lovely person I hope to love.
He smiles. I fake smile.
"Hey cutie." He says and pokes my nose. I scrunch my face. He grabs my waist and hugs me. He put his face to my neck. Then he kisses my cheek.
