She Resides In Me {Completed}

Chapter - 27 (Suffering alone)

After 2 months ..
Two months passed by..yes! It's been two months Nandini left the town..went far away from those people who broke her so badly..that she isn't able to meet her own soul master..
Here everything has changed for manik..he is living his life ..just the way he wants..success is at his feet...but he doesn't know..that he owe this success to Nandini..she gave her happiness to him..and even after getting hurt..she blessed him with the best..
Today manik has everything..name, fame...everything ..but he doesn't have peace..yes!..he is suffering..although he didn't admitted but he is suffering..he isn't able to share his happiness with anyone..no one is there to party with after a rocking concert.. No one is waiting at his home when he comes late..no body calls him day and night..to ask that..he had his food or not?..no one is there..and all these feelings were making him crazy..
But today..something big is going to happen in his life..which will make him face the reality..he will able to face his own cruel face..which ruined someone's else life very badly...
RJ studio :
Today manik has a recording..and he has to sing for the big banner movie..which is a honor for him..when it comes to work..he is very much focused... No compromise with work..
He reached the studio a hour before the recording time..just when he step inside the recording area..he saw RJ talking with someone in his cabin..so he went towards RJ's cabin as he listened his name...
(Rahul jaykar..famous music director as well as great singer..)
RJ : "Emon..stop thinking all this..and concentrate on the movie only..it's a big movie..".. He answered back to aman..who was continuously asking something to RJ..
Emon : " but RJ..am still not getting..why you choose a male voice for this song..even you gave that album to Manik...now this movie too..chal kya raha hai?..new comer mei itna interest kyu?.."...he asked as RJ giving every good opportunity to manik..doesn't make any sense to him...
Although manik is capable enough to grab this opportunity..still there is loads of more experienced people in the industry..then why RJ Is so much interested in Manik...this thought was irking Emon ...Emon chatterjee is best friend of RJ..and a great singer as well..a very renowed one..manik was listening all this standing outside the cabin..and till now..he also become curious to know the reality..
(Emon chatterjee..)
As one fine night..out of no where RJ came in front of him..with a contract in his hand..to sign manik..he was at first was shocked but signed the contract..at that time also he thought..why RJ is do good with him..and today he will get all his answers...
RJ : "Emon please..".. He tried to ignore the question..but emon seems to be adamant to know the answer...
Emon : " RJ we are best friends..you can say anything to me..please.."...he assured him..and now RJ looked at him..and stood up from his chair...
RJ : "that girl emon..only for her..."..he said facing his back to emon and gate...manik was shocked to hear this..but the question was..who is the girl..he is talking about..
Emon : " girl?..kaunsi larki ki baat karha hai tu?.."..he said in confusion..
RJ : "NANDINI MURTHY.."..he announced her name..and this falls as a thunderstorm on manik..
Manik : " Nandini?.."..he said in trance..still in confusion..
Emon : "Nandini..yeh wahi larki hai na..jise tu..."
RJ : "jisse mai pyaar karta hoon...".. He completed emon's left over words..and this was another shock for manik...
Emon : " but uska in Sab se kya connection?..."..he said in confused tone..
RJ : "connection hai..she is the soul reason behind Manik's overnight success...usi ki wajah se manik is standing here..".. He said and all this was hell shocking for manik...
Emon : " will you please put light on it..as am not understanding anything..."..he was still confused and now RJ narrated the whole story..as how he met Nandini in college..how she denied him..and suggested manik's name..then how she sent all his music to him..and next day only..she disappeared...
When manik listened all this..he felt like he will sink in the floor beneath him..Nandini did all this for a jerk like him..she before going from his life..shined for him..and gave all the happiness which was in her hand to him..he was feeling ashamed but still he wasn't capable enough to face his ugly face..
RJ : "sirf sachi mohabbat mei junoon hota hai..khudko fannah kar Jane ka..wo pyaar karti hai manik se..usne so sab manik ke liye ..aur maine uske liye..kyunki mai use pyaar karta hoon..."... He said with a smile on his face...
Emon : " par wo hai kaha?..and manik never talked about her?.."...
RJ : "I don't know ..wo kaha hai..and I even don't know..why manik never talked about her?..but kuch toh galat hua hai uske sath..".. He said after recalling his last convo with Nandini..how he sensed pain in her voice..that night...
Manik felt weak in his knees.he start walking outside the studio..in a trance..still thinking whatever happened inside..he was still not believing all this...
Malhotra mansion :
Manik came back home..but he was totally lost..how can Nandini be so self less..the day he snatched her everything from her..that day only she blessed him..instead of cursing him..he was walking inside the mansion..thinking about all that..
Manik : "tumne yeh sab kyu kiya?".. He said totally lost..just when he collided with Nyonika..
Nyonika : " are you blind manik?"..she shouted at him..his trance broke by that collision...
Manik : "listen Nyonika ..am not in a mood please...".. He said in irritating tone.. And start moving again..Nyonika watched him in surprising manner..as today manik didn't mis behaved..he simply walked out ..it's so not him...
Nyonika : "lagta hai tumhari wo friend ..kaafi kuch sikha rahi hai tumhe..kya Nam hai uska..Han..NANDINI"..as soon as manik heard her name..he stopped..right on his spot..and turned around to look at Nyonika..
Nyonika was again surprised by his behavior...as manik turned around to listen her..is something never had ever happened...
Nyonika : " something is definitely changed in you manik.."..she said in a little low voice...manik.chuckled sarcastically..
Manik : "changed..everything is changed Nyonika..bas tumhare paas waqt nhi hai..apne khudke bete ke changes ko dekhne ka...".. He said totally mocking at her..and now Nyonika was furious...
Nyonika : " oh really??..you want me to see the changes..I thought your friends are your first priority.. Cabir..Kajal and that Nandini..pure time you were with them..and you are accusing me?..seriously?.."..she retorted back...
Listening his friends names..manik was stunned...indeed she is right..he was always with them..but today he is alone.. Standing alone..suffering without them..
Nyonika : "and one more thing..am not your NANDINI ..Jo tumhari koi bhi bakwas sun loon..aur kuch bolu bhi nhi..she is far better than you..I wonder how she became your friend...you don't deserve a pure heart girl..".. She was saying all this in anger..and manik was stunned..his evil money minded mom..is talking good about someone..
Manik : " you are right..I really don't deserve her.."..he said recalling the past incident...and walked upstairs to his room...while Nyonika watched him totally in shocked manner...
Manik's room :
He came inside the room..he was alone today..he want to talk with someone..he want to discuss all that with someone..He picked his phone and unknowingly he dialed Nandini 's number..and once he listen that number is switch off..he realized that he dialed Nandini's number..
Manik : "what's wrong with me?..".. He said and came towards the mirror ...and recalled how Nandini met him before going away.. (I showed this scene in the starting of this story) ...
" agar kabhi..mirror ke samne khade hokar tum apni najro sei najre mila paye...toh samjh Lena..tumne kabhi kuch galat nhi kiya.."..he recalled nandini's words on their last meeting ...and now when he tried to meet his gaze in the mirror..his eye lashes automatically went down..and he was stunned ..for a second he wasn't able to accept that he did wrong..he committed a sin..then he reminisced her face when she went out of mansion that night...how much hurt she was...in how much pain she was...
He saw the flower vase and threw it on the floor in anger..hurt..pain..guilt.. And the glasses spread all over the floor..he fell down on his knees...and recalled how he ditched Nandini..but she went out from his life without saying anything..without cursing him..but she blessed him...
Just then he saw someone entering in his room..when he raised his head a little..he found nandini standing on the door..
Nandini came towards him..and sat down beside manik..he looked at her with deep red eyes..filled with tears and guilt...
Nandini : "khudko hurt kareho ho?"..she asked very softly placing her hand on his cheek...
Manik : " tumhe bahut hurt kiya Maine.. Tumhe nafrat karni chahiye mujhse pyaar nhi.."..he said looking in her eyes...
Nandini : "hum jinse pyaar karte hai na manik..unse naraj ho sakte..unpe gussa ho sakte hai..par hum kitni bhi koshish kar me..unse nafrat nhi kar sakte..".. She explained with a smile on her face and he was looking at that peace on her content face...
Manik : " tumne itna sab kiya..mujh jese insaan ke liye..I don't deserve all this...tum wapas aa jao Nandini..mai sab theek kardunga..please come back.."..he said holding her hand tight.. And placed his hand on his own heart...
Nandini : "I resides in you... Try to look inside..".. She said and with her hand she closed his eyes..and he recalled her happy face..she dancing in the rain freely...playing in the mud..giving him deadly stare..her care free laugh...a smile appeared on his lips..but soon his smile faded away as a sad hurt face of Nandini flashes in front of his eyes..and he opened his eyes...
He looked all around in his room and found no trace of Nandini..he broke down ..he realized what he did...he snatched smile of her face..the girl who was so lively ..he snatched the reason of her existence from her..he ripped her soul..broke her in so many pieces that it's now in powdered form..nothing is left ...
Manik : " mere ego mei..yeh kya kardia mene.."..he said in low voice...
Soon his low voice turned into the biggest scream..
Manik : "aaahhh".. He shouted his lung out...as if something shattered inside him..as if he won but after loosing everything..
(Background Music) :
After 1 hour...
Ye dil tanha kyun rahe
Kyun hum tukdon mein jiye
Ye dil tanha kyun rahe
Kyun hum tukdon mein jiyein
Kyun rooh meri ye sahe
Main adhoora jee raha hoon
Hardum ye keh raha hoon
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai (x2)
(Manik was sitting on his bed..nandini and his pictures are all over scattered on his bed...till now he realized one thing..that he needs her..he want her back..he did a sin..and in his insanity,..he ruined everything..tears were continuously flowing out of his eyes..looking at her pictures..)
Andheron se tha mera rishta bada
Tune hi ujaalon se waaqif kiya
Ab lauta main hoon inn andheron mein phir
Toh paaya hai khud ko begaana yahaan
Tanhaayi bhi mujhse khafaa ho gayi
Banjaron ne bhi thukra diya
Main adhoora jee raha hoon
Khud par hi ik sazaa hoon
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai
(he moved out from his bed..taking nandini's pic in his hand..he looked all around in his room..there was only darkness..and only he is responsible for this darkness..he cursed himself..he was crying very badly..tears are not stopping ...they are flowing..not because he wants her back..because he realized his sin..but it's already too late..he moved a little ahead and he tripped and fall directly on the ground...and there is no one to hold him back..)
Hmm.. tere jism ki woh khushbuein
Ab bhi inn saanson mein zinda hai
Mujhe ho rahi inse ghutan
Mere gale ka ye phanda hai
Aaa..
(He recalled how she submitted herself to him..and how he ditched her..he touched his own hand..after sitting back on the floor..and he can feel her touch on him..it's still fresh..but he is suffocating ...that thought itself making him hate himself..he didn't touched her with love...he touched her to win the bet..and it was making him insane...he feels like ..he threw dirt on her pure soul..)
Ho.. tere choodiyon ki woh khanak
Yaadon ke kamre mein goonje hai
Sunkar isey aata hai yaad
Haathon mein mere zanjeerin hain
Tuhi aake inko nikaal zaraa
Kar mujhe yahaan se rihaa
Main adhoora jee raha hoon
Ye sadaayein de rahaa hoon (sadaayein: awaaz)
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai
Mujhe teri zaroorat hai
(he reminisced the sound of her bangles...her carefree laugh...and then her lost ..hurt ..painful face...all those memories were making him crazy..were punishing him..making him suffocate,..he realized how much alone he is ..he needs her...but he ruined everything..)
Manik : "maaf kardo mujhe nandini...please...ahhh"...he said crying very badly...and screamed in high pitch voice...
Manik : "laut aao...please laut aao...mai nahi jee paunga is dard ke sath nandini..nahi jee paunga..mujhe saza do..mujhse nafrat karo..par please wapas aa jao..."...he said looking at her pic in his hand..while tears were continuously flowing out of his eyes...
After some hours...he called his manager..and asked him to find NANDINI MURTHY..and soon he get to know her whereabouts...without wasting time..he flew away to MUMBAI..that night only..and after reaching there..he thought to face nandini..but he had no guts left..he has no strength to look in her eyes...he just can't ..and from that day ..he lost all the peace..and start living in the guilt...
Nandini's silent exit from his life..broke him down...he wanted punishment..but her silence was itself a big punishment for him...
IT'S THE END OF PAST TRACK..