Her protector

The dream

~Lydia~

Walking into my house, knowing what was coming. I regret going in, but where else could I go. I couldn't go anywhere since Jessica has my keys.

Her face was all I could see. "What?" I was mad, no, more than mad, I was extremely irritated with her, after all she was the one spying on me. "What did he say?!? What did he want?!"

I sigh knowing that she wasn't going to stop until I told her. "Well he wanted to hang out. No BIG DEAL."

Her mouth drops. She was looking at me like I had just smacked her. "No big deal? Are you joking?!" Her face seemed frustrated.

"No I'm not joking and will you please stop staring at me like that?" I was trying to be nicer. I mean Austin just basically asked me out, unless he just wants to be just friends. I guess that could be kind of confusing.

"He asked you to hang out with him! Thee Austin Colt!" Jessica seemed to be in another world. Lost in her own thoughts. I couldn't be around her right now. She was getting on my nerves to the point where I wanted to punch her in the face.

I made my way past her. My brain was nuts. I couldn't concentrate on anything. I just really needed some alone time and any amount of distance away from Jessica was going to be paradise.

I started to head up the stairs to my room. "Where are you going?" She doesn't know when to shut her trap. "Isn't it obvious? I'm going to my room." I spat out.

"Fine ." She mumbled some other choice words that I really didn't pay any attention to. When I got to my room, I felt tired. Both physically and mentally. I groaned at the sight of my room. Now I can see why I have been avoiding being in here.

I've been sleeping in the living room. It's not like my parents will notice. They're never around and quit frankly they don't care, even when it seems as though they do. They put up a show for everyone else to see. The car was just for show. I mean sure it's mine but its because they care about their reputation.

Shutting the door and looking around. All my memories lay here and I instantly hate it. A single tear slide down my cheek when I made my way to the photo placed on my night stand. These two were the only parents I had.

I'm standing in the middle of them. There happy which instantly makes me happy, but at the same time sad. More tears were sliding down my face and before I realized my own actions the picture shattered into a million pieces against the wall.

Just when I thought that my luck was changing. My face, drenched in tears I go and clean up my mess. "I'm sorry you guys. I let you down. I'm trying believe me, but it's just so hard. I love you guys and miss you." I kiss the picture and place it in my drawer.

I went into the bathroom that is connected to my room . I star at myself in the mirror. My blond hair waves perfectly around my face. Looking in the mirror I see someone I don't recognize. It's me, but it doesn't look like me. I continue to stare in disgust. How can anyone stand to be near someone like me.

I'm a disgrace. I feel wretched. I'm disappointed with myself and so would the only people that loved me. I know they weren't my real parents, but they were the only closest to parents I had. I can't keep thinking about them. Sure it makes me feel happy, but in the end it hurts. How would Austin feel about knowing the truth. How would he feel knowing I killed his parents?

I look down. I can't look at myself anymore. Regret surrounds me. I always am too careful. I try stay away from mirrors and anything that reminds me of the past, but of course sometimes I just can't escape my past. I go back to my room and grab my iPod.

Music always makes me feel better in the end.

I'm bullet proof nothing to loose fire away fire away. You shoot me down but I won't fall I am titanium.