If You Only Knew

Chapter 3

I lose it and run into his arms and more tears start to pore out. I'm sobbing into his expensive suit probably ruining it. My legs are no longer able to keep me up, his strong arms around me are the only things from keeping me from collapsing on the ground.

Then I realize what's happening. I'm hugging the guy that left me for dead when I was younger. I push him away from me and look into his eyes, which are blood shot from crying. There is a tear lingering on his check that he hasn't whipped away yet. I whip my tear soaked face. I look back at him and shake my head and tell him three words he probably would never have expected to come out of my mouth at this moment. Then I run out of the house crying even more.

"Ryan! Ryan!" Johns calling my name almost like the time at the pond.

The memory of him calling my name makes me stumble and I fall in the grass crying more. He's getting closer. I get back up and start running again but I'm slower this time. John catches up to me and pulls me to the ground with him. Holding my arms down and against him. My body goes slack and he just sits there and holds me while I cry into his shoulder.

"What's going on," Daren asks.

Neither John nor I say anything.

"Dad please. What the hell is going on?"

"Daren give us some time alone please. I need to talk to her," John says.

Daren starts to protest but John tells him to give us sometime and he'll explain everything later. Daren does what he's asked and him and Tanner go back to the house.

I stay in John's arms for a while and when I start to shiver he takes off his suit jacket and wraps it around me. Once I know for sure that I'm finished crying, I look up at him.

"Your ruining your suit," I say.

"I don't care about the suit," he says, "I want to know why your even here."

That question hit me like a knife through the heart. I try to push away from him but he keeps me there on his lap like I was five years old again.

"Let me go, John. If you don't want me here then let go so I can get the hell out of here," I say trying to pull away from him but he won't give in. I look up into his eyes and I'm about to tell him to let me go again but he looks hurt and I don't say anything.

"Why would I want you gone," his eyes start tearing up and his voice is breaking, "You have no idea how much I've missed you Ryan. No idea. Ever since your mom told me you've died. It felt like half of me has died right there and then. I didn't want to do anything but stay in bed all day but then I remembered your brother. I told myself he already lost a sister he's not going to lose his father too. That's what I told myself everyday until well, today. When I came home and saw you standing there. I thought it was my mind playing tricks on me, I couldn't believe you were right there in front of me."

Tears start falling down my face again. We sit there in silence for a while absorbing each others presence. Then I see something glowing in front of the house. The fountain.

John turns to see what I'm looking at and spots the fountain also.

"Do you like it," he asks.

"Yeah I do. But I'm not dead."

"That you aren't," he laughs and kisses the top of my head.

"Does your mother know your here," John asks.

"She doesn't care where I am."

"So your telling me she doesn't know where you are."