Until Dawn Prompts

I love You

Prompt for Statiic97 on FF.net; Continuation of 'I like Animals (And You), 'I was wondering if you could write a piece about Chris and Josh after Chris finds him?'

'Of course I can! I'm amazing bruh. Lol, not rly. Ignore me.

Words: 1527

Pairing(s): Josh/Chris (Climbing Class), Background!Ashley/Sam (The Badass and The Paranoid), Mentioned!Matt/Mike (M^2), Ex-Josh/Matt (Let's Get This Fire Started), Mentioned!Mike/Jessica (He Came for Me), Mentioned!Jessica x Emily (Looking out for my Girl), Mentioned!One-sided!Chris x Ashley (None of it was wasted), Mentioned!Chris x Emily, Mentioned!Emily x Matt (Flare gun/ You're a Person), Mentioned!Mike x Emily (He's My Man)

Additional Tag(s): Pansexual!Josh, Bisexual!Chris, Flashbacks, Bisexual!Ashley, Demisexual!Sam, Pansexual!Jessica, Bisexual!Emily, Bisexual!Matt, Bisexual!Mike, DemiBoy!Josh, Demigirl!Jessica.

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I ran out if Ashley's apartment, knowing that I had to get to Josh as fast as I could before he did anything drastic, and knowing Josh he definitely will do something dramatic and possibly live threatening. I jumped into my Jeep and made sure I buckled in, checked the mirrors, everything. It's been a habit ever since I was 15 and no matter what I can't really stop doing it. Josh makes fun of me all the time about it. On the ride there I made sure to keep Josh on the line, on speaker phone as I drove, talking to him and listening to him cry on the other end. I could feel tears prickling at the corners of my own eyes and had to stop myself before I crashed or worse. I hate hearing Josh cry, it's always been the worse thing to hear and I hope to never hear it again after this.

I have to tell Josh how I feel before I fuck it all up. I've never been good at admitting my feelings for others ever since I was 8 which is where I met Josh in Third Grade. Back then I had the smallest of crushes on him, which didn't bother me in the slightest since I had no idea about homophobia, even a little girl named Sam -Could it be the same Sam Ashley goes on about? Hmm- encouraged me to give him a flower crown on Valentines Day. So when the time came for Valentine's Day I had made a white and blue carnation flower crown. It was a bit messy and not put together very well but Jessica, my cousin, helped me do it. I had sat it on his desk before he showed up and when he saw it he instantly put it on and boasted about having someone crush in him. I never told him it was me. After that he wore it as long as he could until the flowers finally died completely about a week later. He looked so heartbroken that it had died and grumbled about it for a whole month until I finally made another one, this one out of fake flowers so they'd last forever and again, sat them on his desk before he showed.

He wore them the rest of the year until his head got too big for them. Now he hangs it in his bedroom where he can see it whenever he wants. He still wonders who gave him the crown. I never told him.

Once we were 13 and beginning to got through puberty I knew that my feelings for Josh were definitely not platonic. Unless imagining your best friend fuck you is platonic.

That's when Josh started to date girls, Josh told me in secret that he actually preferred boys but said his father hated gays which he found out when he saw a gay couple on TV and his dad went off about them, complaining for a week every time they did so. It made me sad knowing Josh was being forced to live a certain way.

I began to date girls as well, one in particular was Emily Carraway who was mean, but she told me she had always had a crush on me and called me a Nerd all the time. We were actually a really nice couple, Emily was smart like me, she loved to go out with me to the movies, skating rink, really whatever was within walking distance. Then we got into Highschool which is where everything changed. Emily dumped me for Mike Munroe, whom by the way was a huge dweeb in Middle School, he had braces and glasses and dressed weird. When we came back from Summer he had gotten contacts and got rid of his braces, making him 99% hotter. Even I was into him Freshman year. Josh had broken it off with whatever girl he was with and we started to hang out again like we use to.

Sophomore year was when it got a bit strange, Emily was still with Mike, they were the power couple of the school, Emily and I were still on good terms, and Josh was still single and had become a bit more. . . unstable. One day he straight out kissed me while we were playing video games and well, let's just say that we never finished the game that night. The day after we agreed to never tell anyone. So we didn't.

Junior year was when I met Ashley Elaine Prescott, who all in all was the person of my dreams. Except she really wasn't my preferred gender. So when she tried to ask me out I had to tell her the truth during Senior year, she looked broken of course and I apologized if I had led her along, she just waved me off with a smile and said it was completely fine and that she shouldn't have assumed I was flirting with her.

We're still best friends to this day.

During our second year of college Josh dropped out and began to date Matt, who was dating Emily who broke up with Mike who is now dating Jessica and also having a side fling with Matt. I didn't like the fact that they were together at all because I barely knew Matt. He seems like a nice guy but he was fucking Mike on the side, or letting Mike fuck him? I'm not really sure. From what I heard from Mike that them getting together was a total accident and that he had been making a joke about making out and then it actually happened and Mike really liked it but is in love with Jessica who admitted to me during one of our Cousin Meet Ups that she was actually in love with Emily and because Emily is single that her and Jessica had been also having a fling. It confused me greatly and I just wish they would all figure it out and leave me out of it. If it was me, Mike and Matt could go fuck eachother and leave Josh alone, and if Jessica and Emily were happy together let them be together.

One thing I love about my cousin is that she constantly gives a big fuck you to gender identities. She told me that she identified as a Demigirl. Then Josh said he was the same, but Demiboy. I accepted both of them of course.but Jessica had not yet told Mike or Emily, fearing what they would say about it. I've thought of telling Jessica all about the whole M^2 thing but never really had the guts to do it. .I just wish my friends could figure this all out and be happy.

I finally pulled up into Josh's driveway and rushed inside, hoping desperately that I wasn't too late. When I made it into his house after finding the damn key that they are constantly moving I ran up to the bedroom, almost knocking the door down. When I finally got my balance back I looked over and saw Josh sitting on his bed, looking down at the wood flooring. I slowly walked up to him and sat down.

We sat in silence for who knows how long, during that time we ended up curled up on the bed together, Josh's head resting on my chest as I breathed in slowly and allowed.him to wrap our legs together, anything to help him. I felt him move a bit and felt a small kiss on my jaw, he seemed to notice that I froze since he sat up, spewing apologies and saying how much if a dumbass he was for doing that. I shushed him and sat him down as he mumbled into his clenched fists. I took them in my hands and slowly kissed each knuckle, whispering sweetly to him as I did so, admitting somewhere in there that I had been in love with him for a decade, which I heard him laugh and call me a liar about. When I had looked up at him in the eye he stopped, realization dawning on him and he broke down, once again apologizing over and over again for never noticing and that he wishes he could turn back time. He stopped after a while and took a deep breath.

"You gave me the flower crown, didn't you?" He asked softly, his voice almost too low to hear. I just nodded and he fell into me, holding onto me tightly and pulling me into his lap, telling me he loves me too and that he was so so sorry for all the shit he put me through. I let him get it all out and when dusk hit, we were both tired, just listening to each others breathing and stealing kisses here and there.

"I'm such a dumbass. . . .I've already missed 10 years of this." Josh mumbled into my hair and I shook my head.

"Even just being your friend, your best friend, was enough for me Josh. . . .I only ever wanted you to be happy."