Mental

Chapter 17- It's not your fault

My heart was beating so fast in my chest. It felt like it was going to burst out. I was frozen in place, laying down and looking up at the ceiling. My eyes were focused on every knick in the ceiling, watching the ceiling fan spin way to fast. I wasn't sure where I was, all I knew was I was extremely hot, my hands were all clammy, my heart was racing but yet my skin felt cold.

"Hey beautiful." Evans face came into view, him hovering over me as I laid on the bed. Why was he here? He's not supposed to be here. I'm safe here.

You're never safe, idiot girl.

"Smile for me sexy. You know i love when you smile." His face had a big grin on it as he moved his hand up to touch my face. This isn't happening again, it can't.

I tried to speak but I couldn't, my mouth was dry and my lips were cracking. I looked at him and his eyes locked with mine, all I could do was scream. And I did. I screamed until my chest was burning and my lungs felt like they were going to explode.

"Madeline!" My body jolted and I sat up, my head feeling light and dizzy. The room was dark and someone was standing over the bed, their hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah?" I whispered, my throat sore.

"Are you okay?" Liam asked sitting down onto the bed. "You woke everyone up, you were yelling really loud." He spoke softly as he moved closer to me.

"Uh, I just had a bad dream. I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was actually screaming." I apologized immediately feeling bad.

"No, it's alright. Im just really worried." He pulled me into a hug against his warm chest.

"I'm good, it was just a bad dream. I'm fine." I breathed out, my body still shivering a little bit. "I'm alright now, you can go back to bed."

"Madeline, this has happened 3 other times tonight... do you not remember?" Liam held my shoulders and pushed me back a bit. I shook my head but I knew what it was. Dissociative Amnesia. I experienced a degree of it at Long branch after an... incident.

"Uh no, I'm alright though. I don't want to keep you up. It's like 3am."

"How about i just stay in here with you alright? Maybe that'll make you feel... safer." He suggested it hesitantly. I nodded, I didn't want to wake anyone up again.

I slightly wondered why Harry never came in... just to check on me.

"I'll lay over here, give you your space. Just know i'm here, okay?" He laid down near the edge of the bed, facing away from me.

I moved to other side, facing his back, my breath short and heavy. "Harry's been trying to get in here. He keeps getting angry though. He'll hear you scream and then just get mad about what happened. I think Louis' still talking to him." Liam told me and I felt my body relax, for whatever reason.

~

"She should tell her mom, I think." I heard Daisy say as I sat on the stairs, around the corner from the kitchen.

"She won't." Harry muttered. "She's too scared."

"But why? Her mom would understand." Daisy told him, but she had no idea. She had no idea about Long Branch.

"I just think no one should pressure her into doing anything. It's bad enough this happened on her birthday. She's gonna need some time guys." There goes Liam, always being rational. "But, she does need a rape kit done. Just in case she does decide to file charges."

"Yeah, she definitely needs to do that. I can take her today, I'll go get her." I heard Daisy's foot steps and turned to run up the stairs. I rushed into the bathroom before she came to the stairs. "Mads? You good in there?"