Stand Up and Remember (One Direction Fan-Fic)

Chapter 36

Author's Note

The number of reads for each chappie has gone down :( Can I get you to all ask around and see if I can get at least 500 reads per chappie? That would be awesome :) And thanks for voting guys! Please keep it up! Is it because the book has become boring or....? 

I'm still torn between Niall and Josh - there would be no cheating but I don't know what you want!! HELP ME </3

I'm really interested in maybe a sad ending, but that would be too sad. I don't know, what do you think?

                                      ***************** Chapter 36 ~ Bella ***********************

Things since Josh and I stopped filming had slowed tremendously, like the world couldn't keep up with what I was feeling. I was having all sorts of mixed feelings, but I knew that I loved Niall, even though that Josh would always be there. 

We were still in America after a week of resting, playing games, some singing on my half, interviews, and then it all died down a little into the winter holidays. 

Niall and I didn't really go on short sweet dates as often, as the demand for their music was higher than ever if they were to continue being the 'young' boy band they were meant to be. I didn't see much of him about two months after I got back.

So there I was, left alone without anyone, in the hotel lobby, without a key for the room. I was wearing warm skinny jeans, black flat boots, a white tank top with a black jacket with a thin fur lined hood. My hair was on the top of my head in a messy bun, and I felt skinnier than I had in a long time. I had lost quite a bit of weight in the last year, and it was starting to show, but it wasn't unhealthy, I just felt really skinny. I sighed as I looked down at my phone for the bazillienth time that day, and still nothing from Niall. 

I scrolled down and texted Harry: Let me know when you're finished, I'm going out.

I stood up and exited the building, shivering a little at the slight cold before I was swarmed with cameras and film crews. I had no energy for them so I just walked right by them and into the awaiting car with the driver ready to leave at my disposal. I felt bad for the guy, but I wasn't the one paying him. Just another week until the premier. I thought as I nodded to the driver, meaning he would take me somewhere sort of busy, with shops. 

As we drove and I watched the many tall buildings and schools go by, I stopped short. What was I going to do with my life now? I could audition for other things, and I had one album that was almost as popular as One Republic, maybe I could tour with them?

But that wouldn't last. I looked back at the school, I could teach drama or music... Yes. I had my back-up plan. Then I remembered university back in England and I felt a wave of homesickness. My accent hadn't changed but I remembered the rolling greens of England and longed for home in that instant. I had a plan back there, I had family and friends, but I also had a job here, and family here.

I sighed and shook the thoughts out of my head. Shopping. I was going shopping. I didn't know what for, but I was going.

I felt a pang of loss when I remembered how Austin and I had met and we had gone shopping for the sheer hell of it.

And then an idea hit me. Austin, Louis and Josh had been there for me when Niall hadn't. They had helped me with my life, and not Niall. I instantly felt scared. What if Niall was getting bored? What if it was just a game for his fans?

I gulped then took a shaky breath. "Shopping," I whispered to myself in the back seat in the leather heaven I was engulfed into.

The driver stopped, Patrick I think his name was. I thanked him, grabbed my purse from beside me and exited the car, blinded by the dazzling lights of los angeles city and the large shopping centres laid out in front of me. Awesome.