Love Will Hurt//Luke

Thoughts

Joey POV

This well needed trip to the looney bin wasnt helping my pathetic case.

I feel like I'm falling in an endless hole.

To me nothing will ever get better. Luke has been visiting every day like he promised but it's not the same.

I can see him getting weaker and weaker and weaker. He's struggling and putting up with my shit.

Why does he even like me. Why?

That's my fucking probably.

I grew up believing i'm a worthless piece of shit. Stop Joey.

Stop thinking like this. You're past that.

I sigh and sit up on my bed. Its 2:57 am and nothing to do. I get up and walk to my door.

I walk out of my dorm and down the empty hallway that's covered in Christmas decorations.

Yep that's right. I've been in Australia almost a year. Longest stay in the same country.

Its three weeks till Christmas and I'm not looking forward to it what so ever.

I hate Christmas because everyone spends time with their families and guess what? I don't fucking have one.

My step-mom is visiting me today and i feel bad that she has to deal with my shit.

I snap out of my thoughts when i reach the back door. I look outside and i see a person standing near the fence under a tree.

I open the door and realize its my only friend here, Jack.

I feel bad for Jack. He's been through so much. He doesn't deserve it.

His dad died and his mom became distant from him and started hitting him. Trigger warning ! Skip down to the next label if you need to<3

He started self harming and it got really bad to the point where he almost killed himself.

He tried killing himself many times but that time was different. He tried hanging himself and the only thing that stopped him was the thought of the beach and the peaceful waves crashing down on the sand.

He thought it was peaceful so he didn't die that night.

Trigger warning stops stay strong ily all<3

I walked through the dry grass and took a seat next to Jack.

"Couldn't sleep?" He says. I shake my head. The thing is, we both didn't think of each other more than friends.

Luke understood that and is friends with Jack too. See, Jack has light brown eyes, dark dark brown hair thats in a severe fringe. It's basically longer than Mikey's hair at the moment.

Jack has some freckles on his face and is extremely skinny due to lack of eating.

"How are you?" I ask. Jack shrugs. "Im horrible at the moment. How about you?" He asks.

"I want to die. That's how i am." I say. He nods his head. "Same here J." He says.
"Ponder for thoughts?" I ask. He slightly smiles and nods his head.

"Well. I've been thinking about how much it would hurt if i left. Like how would it affect me. Like i don't know, does heaven actually exist anymore?" He says.

"I've been thinking about the universe. How do the planets actually move? Is there some sort of gravitational pull, pulling the earth? Like why don't we just float away from the sun? There's nothing keeping us from doing that. I've also been thinking of what it would feel like if we weren't how we are right now. Like if we both weren't fuck ups and had a happy life. I would be back in California probably at the beach surfing. I wouldn't know you, Luke, anyone here. Like what if my parents didn't die? Like if they somehow avoided it. Would things still be the same before all this happened. Or would my life be the same?" I say, a tear rolling out of my eyes at the thought of my past life.

"Don't cry okay. I wonder that too." Jack says. I nod my head and sigh.

"How crazy would it be if one day we both escaped this hell and made something amazing out of our lives?" I say.

"It would be fucking crazy as shit man. I've always wanted to be an actor." Jack says.

"Same here. When i was younger I would always get the lead role for my plays and i would get compliments saying how i rocked the part." I say.

"Dude. I'm just saying but have you read Legends?" Jack asks. I shake my head no. "Okay so the lead character is named Summer and you look literally the exact definition in the book. You could so try out for the part." He says.

"Dude never do you know how much i hate being the center of attention?" I say. "But it would be so cool ya know?" He says. "Yeah i guess."i say.

"Are we going to back inside?" Jack asks. "No i like it out here. Its peaceful." I say. "I agree. I brought two blankets and pillows because i had a feeling you would be out here." He says.

"Thank you for thinking of me." I say taking a blanket and pillow.

"No worries." He said.

We both looked up at the stars and saw the same thing, but just a little differently.