It's Never Too Late

Chapter 2

This day is all kinds of crazy. I woke up today to my mom being totally mad at me for something I didn't do. Then, I just got to school and I was helping my brother back in. Well, while he was backing up, he pinned my leg in between his truck and his girlfriend's car. I mean, on the bright side I saved the other vehicle. It was just a bad day.

I for real think that people have a hate for me. This whole entire week, something has happened. It's weird. Am I that bad? See, this is what i'm talking about... the more that happens, the more depressed I am. It sucks.

What doesn't help is when you are dating a poop thing for a boyfriend. He always messed with my feelings. I'm telling you, it was hard. One day, he would never wanna see a day without me. Then, the next day he would say that he just wanted to be friends. I never understood his logic. So I gave up. It didn't matter anyways. I always had my eye on this one guy.

He didn't even have to try to be perfect. He already was in my eyes. I loved it. I could be myself and not worry about what he thought. It was crazy. I never thought I could find a love like that. If only he knew how much I needed him.

Actually, I didn't want him to know. I was afraid that if he did then something would change. I have such a low self esteem. It's terrible. I question everything. In my head, two types of thoughts would go through my head. Quotes about them too. It would be like one after another.

"People think depression is sadness.People think depression is crying. People think depression is dressing in black. But people are wrong. Depression is the constant feeling of being numb. Being numb to emotions, being numb to lie. You wake up in the morning just to go back to bed again. Days aren't really days; they are just annoying obstacles that need to be faced. And how do you face them? When you're depressed, you grasp on to anything that can get through the day. That's what depression is, not sadness or tears, it's the overwhelming sense of numbness and the desire for anything that can help you make it from one day to the next."

~Unknown

"Girls are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree."

~Miranda

These are the types of thing's that flow through my mind. It's different thinking that at this age, I would think things like that. But really.. I just tell myself that "it's life."