What you do to me (Durk&Dej).

15. #NuskiGang

Durk.

'Dej open up the door man' i said getting annoyed. I'm all the way in DT for this girl to be playing games. 'Deja' I said banging on her door harder. 'Dej hear him out' Dthang said.

I'm meant to be in Cali and she want to play games. I meant to drop the Beyoncè video and 3d3n today for Nuski and today his birthday and she playing games.

'Man I ain't even want to be here' i said getting angry. 'Then leave' I heard her voice but she ain't opening the door. 'What you want me to do I ain't kiss her she kissed me' i said banging on her door.

'Yea and you kissed her back, Durk just leave dang' she yelled at me. 'Oh my God you pissing me off, I didn't kiss her back just open the damn door' I said as Bandz knocked on her door. 'No' she said. Fuck this I was getting tired.

'Deja please open the door let me talk to you man' i said frustrated. 'Just go Durk for real you ain't ever care' she said and thats when I lost it.

Dej.

'Just go Durk for real you ain't ever care' i said with everything in me out of anger. 'I AINT EVER CARED REALLY? TODAY NUSKI BIRTHDAY AND IM IN DT FOR YOUR ASS AND I SHOULD BE IN CALI RELEASING MY SHIT AND YOU SAYING I AINT CARE GOT ME FUCKED UP. MY COUSIN BIRTHDAY AND HE AINT HERE THAT SHIT HURT DEJ YOU AINT UNDERSTAND' he said yelling as his voice began to shake. I opened the door and found him on the floor with his hands on his face crying with Dthang and Bandz on his side as they embraced him.

I was so angry at myself. I should've believed him man and I should've been there for him especially today because it's Nuski's day. I sat on the floor and embraced him. 'That shit hurt man that shit hurt' he said sobbing. 'I can't sleep every night that shit hurt they took my cousin away from me man and Chino man ion even want to be in this world. I'm tired can i just go instead' and with that I forced him to look at me.

'Don't you ever say that, I need you and yo kids need you. I should've been there for you especially today and I'm sorry I know it ain't easy but he looking out for you. I'm sorry for ever doubting you please forgive me' i said hugging him tight.

Dthang and Bandz just remained silence as Durk just had a emotional breakdown. He was living with this shit inside and always hid his feelings when it came to Nuski and Chino, but it's okay not to be okay. I know he real hurt and he tries to stay strong for everyone but a person can only take so much.

'Listen I don't care whatever happens even if we ain't gone be together or whatever imma love you forever and I ain't leaving I promise you that' i said to him. 'They all said that. Nuski said that and Chino said that but where they at now they gone, lord why me' he said as his voice started shaking again. 'Well I'm stuck in your life forever' i said as he looked up at me as if I was crazy.

'Why is that if you want to walk out on me you can Dej you ain't gotta be there' he said. I figured out this my time to tell him. 'How imma walk out on the man I love with all my heart. I know we both stubborn but shit you've got my heart for real' he ain't say nothing but just stare at me. 'Listen today is Nuski day and we gone celebrate it aight. You go to Cali and do what you gotta do and leave everything to me' i said standing up helping him to stand up.

I looked at him. This man was broken inside he seen so many shit and lost so many loved ones and he tries to hide it with a smile and imma fix him on my daddy and my cousin i had to fix him. He has a good heart for a savage.

'Call me when you reach Cali aight, don't even think about paying for the flight cause imma pay it for you and don't say no' I said smiling at him. He just nod. 'I'm sorry honestly I'm so sorry' I said as he hugged me tightly. 'I will fix you baby I promise' I whispered in his ear.

Durk.

I was in the flight going to Cali. I had a banging headache as I listened to mixtape of Nunu and I. Shit we grown so much. I miss my cousin so much honestly it hurt real bad. Been 2 years and I ain't ever cry like I did today about him.

Nunu always said 'If I ever die ion want y'all to ever cry, crying for bitch niggas, I want y'all to celebrate that shit because if the trigger killed me just remember I was smiling' i said in my head in his voice causing me to smile. Man Lord knows how much I miss him and Chino. I was angry at myself because I couldn't take away the pain Chino and Nunu were in.

I was angry at myself. I was so angry because I wasn't there when they got shot. I was angry because I wanted to take that bullet for my brothers. But I was angry the most because they gone. They ain't here to see me grow and become the person I am today. I felt my eyes water but I tried hard to hold that shit in.

I never met anyone real as my Cousin and Chino. I went on both their Instagrams and there was so many memories. From the day Nunu and I was born we inseparable and the day I met Chino he became my brother. Man this hurts my heart.

'You aight man' Dthang said looking at me as I stared in his red eyes because he too been crying. I shook my head no and just bursted out in tears. I ain't crying cause I was sad. I was crying because I was hurt. 'Man I miss him' i said as Dthang embraced me.

My brother and I embraced eachother for the first time today. 'Listen man you the only one I have please don't ever leave me' i said to Dthang. 'It's otf forever i made a promise to dad and momma to never leave you man'. I'm my brothers keeper forreal. 'We gotta stay strong for anyone else man' Dthang said wiping his tears. 'Yea man crying for the weak' I said wiping mines.

'Nah you got a reason to cry. We all cried at Nunu and Chino funeral expect from you man. Like you bottle that shit in and you gotta let it out man crying ain't for the weak. Men cry too' he said. 'Aight but we gotta turn up tho forreal'. 'Yea we gotta turn up, Nunu style right' he said standing up doing Nunu's dance. 'Yea Nunu style' i said looking out the window up the sky laughing. 'I love you man Nunu, I love you Chino' I whispered closing my eyes.

#Rip Nuski, #Rip Chino 👼🏽.