Downworld

Chapter 12

We made it to the castle in time, though not on time. Raven shook her head, but said nothing at our tardiness, probably thinking it had been for a good reason and not at all because I had been doing naughty things to Malik.

The Red King was already there as well, and he looked between me and his son, opened his mouth as though to say something, then shut it. Malik gave his father an innocent look that told me he was used to getting away with a lot of shit. The Red King shared a frown with Kip, but neither said anything. I had to wonder if I hadn't gotten involved in something more complicated than I'd thought.

But just then wasn't the time to worry about Malik. It was the time to focus so I didn't piss myself when the Black Bear spoke to me, or worse, fly into a blind rage that I wouldn't survive. Because if there was a way the bastard could hurt me more, he would try. I was certain he would, but I wasn't going to make it easy. I'd given that asshole too much already; my pride wasn't going to let me give him any more. If I could help it.

'You all right?' Malik asked. Possibly because I was frowning at a wall while lost in my thoughts.

'Fine,' I replied without thinking. He exchanged a look with Tinder. And I told myself it was the fucking truth and I was going to stay fine until after this was all over and I was alone.

One of the Red King's sworn servants entered the room, and the rest of them straightened -- and there were a bloody lot of the Red King's servants in the room, I supposed to stop the Black bear doing something stupid -- so I'd figured it was time.

'You all right?' Malik asked again, right after the Black Bear entered the room.

I took his hand briefly and squeezed it, hoping he'd stop asking, before stuffing my hands into my pockets. His concern wasn't helping. This was going to be a wreck no matter who was here with me. Because there over the Black Bear's shoulder was my father.

The last time I'd seen my father -- with the exception of the glimpses I'd gotten at Tinder's wedding, when I hadn't been paying enough attention to avoid looking -- I'd been fourteen and he'd just given me 'the talk'. And no, not the sex talk. The 'now that your abilities have developed, you need to be careful not to drain the life out of your lover' talk, because that sometimes happened to succubi and incubi who let themselves get a little too lost in the moment. That would have been difficult enough, but it was quickly followed up by the 'that a boy' talk, and questions about who exactly my 'lover' was, because everyone knew I had one, they just couldn't guess who. My father told me his money was on a boy who'd live down the street, who I'd had a crush on, before the Black Bear raped me and I temporarily became too fucked up to have romantic feelings for anyone.

I'd felt physically sick and mumbled non-committal answers to his questions. I'd wanted so badly to tell him about the Black Bear, but my tongue wouldn't say his name. Learning that I did have the power to murder my lovers would have been good news -- I would have killed that bastard without second thoughts -- except I didn't have a handle on my guardian yet, so I literately couldn't hurt him. Knowing I had the power to make it stop, but not being able to, made me feel a whole brand of shame. It had been my breaking point.  I couldn't pretend everything was fine anymore, and I couldn't stop it from happening, so I'd run away.

That night, I learned how useful my abilities could be as I used them to make the border guards and Gateway doorman let me pass. It had also been useful in getting me money and places to stay before I started to work as a landscaper and found myself a roommate who'd been willing to leave my name off the lease and bills, because the first thing I learned about the above -- apart from that you could get anything for sex -- was that no paperwork equaled no existence.