It Went a Little Somethin Like this

Time changes, and People too

                 Its been 1 month being with Edgar. We got out of that stage of awkwardness, but still shy at times. It was amazing being with Edgar, I thought we would be together forever. Other people thought the same thing as well. Also, GUESS WHAT !?! You all remember Kieth of course, well, he has a girlfriend now. Turns out he asked Avery out, which was typical really. But I was happy for him, especially since he would stop bothering Edgar. But Kieth didn't last long with Avery. They intended to break up multiple times and get back together. Although I found that annoying, I also realized how that just mean't how strong there love was. But it didn't stay strong for long.

       As Kieth broke up with his girlfriend AGAIN !! Edgar has been paying less attention to me. Which I didn't mind, since Kieth was in a bad state, he needed his bro. As I let them be, and Kieth got better over time, I wondered why he broke up with Avery. I texted Kieth, and he told me EVERY THING. Turns out, Avery cheated on him with his best friend. I felt bad for Kieth, so we started to hang out more. As we started to hang out, Edgar started to get jealous. He felt as if Kieth and I had a thing going, and I felt surprised, and angered, since he got mad when I hanged out with Kieth, although he hangs out with girls 24/7. I didn't want to fight with him, I loved him too much to get into fights, and then break up. So I resolved the conflict with him, out of honesty he had told me how he feels as if Kieth is starting to like me and how he might have a crush on me. I thought that Edgar was going insane and was over reacting. But I just disagreed with him in a calm way, and I told him how much I love him, and how we would be together forever, and how I would never ever be with anyone else. He told me how he truly felt loved, and he was. 

     Time is still going, and I then realize how much I was changing. You see, no one took me seriously, so, I started to swear, I thought it would make people take me seriously, and make me like everyone else. But I didn't realize how good it is to stand out. I mean, Edgar always swears, and from there I started to learn  from his examples. I was like a puppy in training, except not in the right training. My personality started to change as well, whenever I was around Edgar, I intended to become someone else. I call that other side of me 'Sylar'. Sylar soon became present everyday, people would ask 'what happened to you?' I intended to ignore them. You see, a dear family member had past away, and he mean't everything to me, and I started to become wreck less, and I didn't care for anything anymore. I usde inappropriate language, lost my innocence, and I made Edgar my number one priority. I didn't have time for my family, I was always on my phone, and I was in a really bad position. I was tired of myself, tired of being a nerd, and I was tired of my friends, I was angry at them, that's when I would have major fights with them. No one understood me, I felt lonely, the loneliness consumed me so much, I was in a state of depression. But how could this be? From a perfect little girl, to a depressed, worn out girl. I started to think about suicide, I would listen to depressing music, I don't know why, but listening to that type of music, had given me flash backs. I didn't want to forget those horrible moments, I wanted to keep being reminded. I knew that if I forget, It will never be remembered, but the thing is, what happened, HAPPENED !! You can't run away from a memory so tragic. 

       I started to not eat, I didn't talk much in school. Everyone was worried for me, family, teachers, friends. But then there were other people, thinking I had done all this for attention. It's funny to think how people say that they 'understand' when truly they don't. It's also funny to think about when a person tells me 'You don't know what I've been through, I've been through worse' when truly, they haven't. It made me so sick, and angry, I just, I wanted to rage quit. So many mixed emotions, and then more problems adding on, I, I JUST WANTED TO DIE !! I felt as if the world would be better off without me, that I was a waste of space, just useless. I remember going to school the next day, as my brother Victor told me, I remembered when you use to be happy. I started to cry, I looked at him, as his eyes were tearing up, and I said 'I do too'. I think we all agreed that I have changed, so there was no point in denying it anymore.