Crush

Crush I

Crush I: 

Honestly, I have no idea why I am writing this. But I reckon if I don’t, I’ll end up going mad because I’m bottling up how I feel. This is about you and me and us, so here it goes...

I’m not your average fifteen year old, but you already knew that. I love to read, write and sleep, I love to do many things, you may find boring. I have serious addictions to such minor things, I’m sure it will surprise you more than it does me. I have the inclination to come up with my own words and stutter over what I say, so that the majority of what comes out of my mouth sounds incoherent.

That’s why I could never speak to you on my own; I was scared I’d say something silly. Also, what makes me, me, is that I tend to trip up, a lot. Whether, I’m walking on the side road or I’m trying to overcome my terrible skills at skateboard, I trip, I fall and you’re there.

Wonderful, huh?

But I guess I can say that no cheesy romantic movie, or fiction stories, that are probably clichéd, could prepare me for what I was about to go through.

A genius needs to write a manual about this shit, because I certainly didn’t sign up for this.

I remember the day you told me that you liked me. For someone who tends to forget a lot of stuff, this surprises me. But I think you can tell why. As usual, you were annoying me, and you knew it. It was like you were purposely doing it. But you weren’t.

We’re sitting beside each other, which surprised me. I thought it was all a bit weird, but I just put it down to you being you. You, being you blackmailed me, into me agreeing for you to have my scarf that day. Eventually I gave in and agreed. I went home that day, cold.

No scrap that, it was fucking cold that day. I remember the numbing sensation I felt from my fingers down to my toes.

It was late and I was eating noodles because I was hungry and noodles were the only thing I could cook at 11 at night. I was talking to my friend, whilst watching some crap on TV; I was waiting for CSI to air.

Unexpectedly, you messaged me saying ‘thank you’. Oh, how I frowned at that, you had my favourite scarf.

We started talking about some random shit, and then out of nowhere you said you have to tell me something. I’m not going to lie, I thought about every possible out-come you could tell me. But I was no way prepared for what you said.

Even today, when I look back and think about it, it’s just unexplainable I guess.

You told me three words that I never thought I’d hear, from the likes of you.

I like you.

__

Song: Bastille “Flaws.”