Raised Ambitions

Sleeplessness

He sat up in bed seeing the beautiful form that slept beside him. Even after so many years it cost him to believe that it was really her...God had given him a new chance to be a happy man on Earth once more. She was the greatest gift God had bestowed on him. And to think that they now had a child together overwhelmed his inner emotions.

Sweet Marianne with her bright optimism, her energetic enthusiasm for life. After that uncouth man had broken her lively spirit, she had regained her sweetness upon her marriage, but it was their child that Brandon noticed had fully restored her back to herself.

Almost two years into their marriage and he still woke up in the middle of the night and found that he still loved to watch her sleep.

Tonight she seemed restless, however. Her brow furrowed and she would not lie still beside him. Perhaps she was having a nightmare, perhaps he should wake her?

Brandon always thought of Marianne as delicate. How could he not, after almost losing her once to the fever.

"Dearest, are you alright?" his hand wrapped around her right arm, shaking it gently. When her eyelids fluttered open, her lips frowned, her eyes showing her confusion. "Were you dreaming?"

Surprise showed on her expressive eyes, "I'm sorry, did I wake you?" she whispered.

"Not at all, I was already awake. You looked troubled in your sleep."

"I . . ." She had been mulling over her idea for months now, since Baby Eleanor's birth. She didn't know how to ask Brandon. She feared he would feel betrayed and after everything he had done for her, he didn't deserve to doubt her love. He was everything to her now. There was no one else in her heart, but him. But how could she ask him without him doubting her feelings for him? Surely any man would feel betrayed.

"Marianne?" Brandon called her back. Her eyes flitted up to his as they had sat up in their bed. His left arm encircled her. "Marianne, what's wrong?"

"Nothing Brandon, you do know I love you don't you?" She wanted to assure him of that.

"I still can't believe it" he smiled down at her.

"There's been something I've been meaning to ask you. . .but I don't know how..." Brandon could see there was a heavy burden on Marianne's spirit that weighed her down.

"Then you only need, but ask..."

"I want to, but I don't know how," her voice saddened.

"Are you afraid I will say no?"

"N-Yes..." she was unsure.

"When have I ever refused you anything?"

"Never. . .Oh yes," suddenly remembering something to use against her husband in a teasing way. He raised his eyebrow. "I seem to recall you not letting me go out riding last year." Her arms crossed over each other then.

"Marianne, a few months ago, you were heavily with child, I couldn't have possibly allowed it. If you were in my place, after having waited so long, do you think I would put both your life and the child's at risk?"

"See? That's why I don't know how to ask you!" Brandon seemed further confused.

"Because I worry too much? How can I not?"

"You worry too much about losing me."

"What can it possibly be Marianne? Some kind of wild pursuit?"

"No, not at all, it wouldn't endanger me in the least. . .it has to do with helping someone."

"How could you think I would possibly object? Don't you know me well enough?" he kissed her brow lightly.

"You might not want to help this person. . ."

"Who Marianne?" but instead of answering his question, she went on to speak in riddles.

"Now Brandon, I just want you to feel assured that this has nothing to do with what I feel for you. . . I only want to help. . ."

"Who do you wish to help?"

"We. I want both of us to be involved in this endeavor."

"which is?" he prodded. If he didn't think it was as serious, he might laugh at his young wife and her worries over his emotional reaction.