Jermaine
This Born Sinner promo tour got me tripping. I don't even remember the last time I had a day off, yet I was off to another interview. Tilting my head back on the headrest I closed my eyes and listened as AZ's voice blared through the speakers while "Life's A Bitch" played. Aiko and Journee were heavy on my mind, but I pushed all those thoughts aside, and went back to my J.Cole persona, I might as well become what people already think I am. Clearly, Aiko didn't give a fuck about me, other wise she would've call. Fuck her! I'm not ready to be a dad anyways. I'm over it. Did I really mean that? I don't know, and I really didn't care right now.
I hopped out the truck and made my way into the Power 105.1 building. I really wasn't in the mood for this bullshit. I just hope it goes quickly. I got a plane to catch anyway. They asked the same questions I always get so it was a breeze. After the interview we hurried to catch this plane. I took a seat by the gate, and waited until boarding.
"Yo let me see the laptop, so I can listen to the song." Ib said.
I passed it to him and watched him nodded along as he listened to it.
"Gate 104 to Los Angeles first class is ready to board." I heard rang out from the intercom.
I tapped Ib, causing him to drop the right headphone from his ear.
"Let me get the laptop, they called for first class." He sighed handing it over to me. Usually I'd wait with my niggas, but today I was beyond tired, all I wanted to do was sleep.
"Is that Nas?" Ib questioned squinting his eyes. I watched as he went to board the same plane as me, I got up and did the same thing.
I caught all the stares I received as I walked to first class. You know the old little white ladies hit you with the "how this nigga get up here" look. They be the first ones to assume I play ball, I guess because of my height. I always shoot them down quickly by telling them I'm a doctor, throwing them for a loop. I found my sit and Nas was seated right behind me. I definitely don't think it was a coincidence.
"Wassup man?" He asked dapping me up.
"Just finishing the album, and this promo tour. Shit, got me a little stressed. On another note though, you one of my biggest idols. Undying Love is one of my favorite songs. I actually made a song that I want you to listen to. I --" I cut myself off when I realized I was rambling and talking way too much. I silently cursed myself for acting like an obsessed fanboy. It's not like this is the first time I meet him.
"What the song called?"
"Let Nas Down" I replied handing the laptop over to him. He slightly bobbed his head with a serious glare on his face. I waited in agony, that was the longest 4 minutes of my life.
"You the one." was all he said for a moment.
"You really bringing back hip-hop, playboy." I nodded not wanting to say too much again.
I turned and situated myself in the seat.
I'm worried about letting Nas down. What about Aiko? Didn't I let her down?
Aiko
I've been in the hospital for two weeks now. I'm gradually getting better, with the help of physical therapy. They took all the tubes out last week. I hated not being able to talk. Shit, I couldn't even sing, that's what irked me the most. Thank god I have my voice, I would've went berserk. I still can't believe I felt asleep at the wheel. I mean I remember being tired and that's when everything goes black.
I can't wait to go home. I'm sick of this nasty ass food, little ass bed, and being confined to this room. Yeah, I get to leave when I go to physical therapy, but then its right back to this dumbass room. I miss my Journee even though, she's here everyday with Blair. It just wasn't the same. I just wanted to climb in my bed and pass out with Journee next to me.
I sat up looking towards the door, they should be coming soon. I checked the time on the television and like clockwork Blair came strolling in with my baby attached to her hip. Her face lit up once she seen me. Maybe she missed me as much as I missed her.
"Hey boo." I said to Blair as she smiled handing me a paper bag. She snuck a snack in everyday for me. This is exactly why she's my bitch.
"How you feeling?"
"Could be better, I'm living though." She nodded in understanding.
I grabbed the bed railings, pushing myself back a little. I reached in the bag, and retrieved the donuts out of it and devoured them like I hadn't ate in years. I lifted my head up feeling eyes on me. My eyes were meet with Blair's hard stares. We immediately burst out laughing.
"When was the last time you ate?" Blair jokingly asked. I cocked my left eye up before responding.
"I don't even remember. This food here sucks." I said chuckling.
"When you get out I'm taking you to dinner."
"I'm holding you to that." She slyly shrugged her shoulders.
"No you didn't hit me with the Kanye shrug." I resorted causing her to giggle.
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|Two Weeks Later|
I walked into my room and got right to work. I've been out of commission for a month, and I needed to finish this mixtape. Other people probably would have rested but I don't have the time to do that. I grabbed my notepad and began. I put the instrumental on and vibed out to it humming along. I leaned forward and layed flat on my stomach causing Jour to stir next to me. I ran my hands up and down her back until she felt into a deep slumber, gently caressed her cheek with the back of my thumb before allowing a sigh to escape my lips. Nothing about Journee read me, from her thick eyebrows to her forehead and feet nothing read me. Truthfully, if I didn't have her I would've already given up on everything.
Focusing my attention back on my notepad, writing the first thing that came to my mind. I like to think of myself as a lyricist. I might not spit like rappers do but I sing real shit. Everything I sing is what I believe in unlike rappers who speak one thing, but actions are the total opposite. Rings too many bells, doesn't it? I pushed all thoughts of him to the side before they could fully form. This shit isn't easy, I take my time perfecting this shit, because I know I only have one shot. You know first impressions are everything?
When I finished I had two songs written. I felt accomplished. Everything was finally falling into place. I stood up making my way down the hallway. Blair wasn't out here like I expected. I walked back down the hall placing a few knocks on the door before turning the knob. Surprisingly, she wasn't there either. I guess she went out. I mean she definitely deserves it. I plopped down on the couch while grabbing the remote. I guess I'll catch up on everything I missed because they only had certain channels in the hospital. There was absolutely nothing on, huffing as I flicked through the channels. I stopped once his familiar face flashed across the screen. Shit, he looked happy. Looks can be deceiving though. I hope he's miserable, but I would never go as far to wish harm on him. As much I hate him, I have to deal with the fact that I'll be seeing him around. I just don't know how its going to be face to face. I went against watching his interview and turned the t.v. off.
