Dead To Me ~ Jerrie Thirlwards

1

From time to time Perrie would remember bits and pieces of her time on earth, such as when Jade made ridiculous requests such as getting a pet, or when Jade would make Perrie laugh until her sides hurt. Perrie nearly cried every time she would remember, stifling her sobs by biting her hand harshly until she couldn't feel the perpetual pain and the blood stopped pouring. Perrie hated remembering because she wanted nothing more than to feel Jade's body beside hers when she went to bed, and to stroke Jade's tan skin when she awoke. Perrie wanted Jade back, and Jace was taking too long to figure out how to get Perrie back to earth. Perrie eagerly ran into Cora's room, the tears still paving their way down her cheeks as she ran, leaving stains of sorrow on her prominent cheekbones.

As soon as she walked into Cora's room, she saw Jace and Cora making out on the floor, Perrie's gags echoing throughout the room as they stopped.

"Sweet Jesus Cora, you're fifteen for the rest of eternity calm the h--- down with your hormones!" Perrie screeched, laughing as Jace scrambled off of Cora and awkwardly whistled like nothing happened.

"You know I'm older than you technically, right?" Cora said, casually walking over to Perrie and slinging her arm over the blonde's shoulder.

"In your dreams buttercup. You've been dead for two years. I'm 22." Perrie reminded, chuckling as she shoved Cora's arm off of her shoulder. "Anyways, Jace, do you have any ideas?"

Jace nodded and ran to his little alcove of heaven, grabbing the necessary materials to get Perrie back on earth, hopefully. Jace returned with ropes, a hook, and various other dangerous objects and made a grapple. He threw the rope out of their cloud-like space and watched as it plummeted towards the ground.

"Jace, that doesn't look safe, and who's to say this is permanent either, like I want?" Perrie insisted, not too keen on the outcome.

"Just because we feel pain doesn't mean it matters, and besides, the big man himself said he'd let you become a human again if you just proved yourself. If you don't wanna leave this way then talk to him."

Perrie huffed and made her way to the realm of God, prepared to awkwardly ask him to let her live again. She walked in to his little house and found him on his little couch.

"Hey, sir, can I um, can I go back to earth?" Perrie asked, shifting her weight around.

"Prove yourself and you can. For what reason should I put you back on earth?" God beckoned.

"Because it's tearing me up inside know that my partner is in such pain, and I want nothing more than to see her again." Perrie said, holding back tears.

"Alright, I will put you back on earth, but remember, you will not be back where you want to be, only where you shall be. No one who knows you're dead will know you're alive until you speak to them, and most importantly, certain things lead to the consequence of death again." God said, casting Perrie back to earth, Perrie's ever flowing tears making it difficult to get her down safely. Cora and Jace watched from their windows, smiling happily as their friend of a few "death-years" floated down where she belonged.

Jade had given up on Sam at this point, his constant girlfriend shopping for her becoming a bit much.

"Sam, stop, no one compares to Perrie." Jade insisted, tugging Sam's sleeve so he'd stop searching.

"Jade, I just want you to be happy." Sam said, looking down at his best friend, who seemed so frail right now. Jade's eyes were still watering, her life without Perrie just wasn't the same. Perrie was her other half, she completed Jade, and Jade could never have her beside her again.

Perrie was now wandering amongst unknown streets, unsure of where she was, or if she was even in the same country. She'd been to a few different countries in her days, and she had no clue where she was. She wandered along until she bumped into a girl that reminded her so much of Jade, she almost began crying.

Jade had barely stopped crying since Perrie died, lashing out on her friends when they tried to help. Besides Sam, the only person she talked to was Jesy. Jesy told her she'd always be there, and Jade furiously hung up the phone, racking with sobs.

Perrie said the same thing, and Perrie's gone now.

Jade's mind was numb to everything besides pain, and she was never happy anymore. Jade thought that the girls would always be there for her, but she couldn't trust them anymore. Jade had been dropped and shattered on the floor, her heart in small, fragile pieces on the floor, her one true love now gone forever. Jade didn't want to live anymore, let alone live with herself. Jade was constantly reminded of Perrie whenever she left her flat, on the rare occasion she did leave. Jade would think about her all the time. Sometimes just going to bed would trigger a memory.

~~~

Perrie sat against the wall grumpily as Jade left the flat, leaving to buy alcohol for whatever reason. Jade was walking to the car so she could drive to the store, when Perrie came running out of the house.

"Jade, why do you need alcohol? You don't usually drink." Perrie began, a confused look in her eyes."Why don't you just come back inside so we can go to bed. It's getting late." She insisted, gesturing towards the setting sun hanging lowly over the nearly black sky.

"I just thought we could get some wine to relax and unwind. I know you've been stressed out lately." Jade countered, looking at Perrie. Perrie shrugged and softly smiled at Jade, revealing those pretty white teeth Jade fell in love with. "Fine, I'll go out for it the morning." Jade caved, walking back inside the flat with Perrie.

As they lay down in the bed, Perrie said three words to make Jade's heart flutter.

"Jade?" Perrie said, looking at the wall.

"Hmm?" Jade hummed in reply, picking at her nails after she got comfortable.

"I love you."

Jade smiled as her heart went aflutter, butterflies bouncing all around her stomach. "I love you too." She replied, leaning her head into Perrie's chest as she fell asleep, the last thing she felt being a kiss on her forehead and a loving mumble.

~~~

Jade bursts into sobs for the tenth time that day, her eyes occasionally flicking to what used to be Perrie's office, before her passing, as more and more tears fled down her cheeks and onto the floor, leaving small puddles in their wake. Jade couldn't contain her emotions anymore, the pain of loneliness overtaking her as she realized the ultimate truth.

She'd never find another person to love her as much as Perrie loved her.

Sam hadn't left Jade's flat since the day of Perrie's death, and the most heartbreaking part of all of this, to Sam, was watching his once headstrong friend disintegrate into what she never wanted to be; dependent. Jade was once the strongest person he knew, and now she was shaking on the floor, broken, fragile, and deathly thin. She wasn't eating like she should, only pushing around her food like it was poison. Her once bright, beautiful brown eyes were now dull and resembled mud rather than a golden sunset, and her perfect complexion was now dreary. Her hair was terribly knotted and her features were emaciated. Jade looked terrible, felt terrible, and hated herself.