Broken Hearts

Change

Something was changing in Josh. His mannerism, the way he viewed situations, his behavior around women, and even the way he walked were all different. It seemed Josh's many attempts at flirtatiousness with Shira were becoming less pretending to be something he wasn't to win her back and more apart of him. His female friends at work would call him a "bad boy" but LaToya called him a man slut. That was the thing too. LaToya and Josh were drawing more and more distant by the day. Their argument sprung from the smallest problems and grew into huge fights that left them both fuming or in tears. Josh's life was falling apart, slowly but surely inevitable and he was trying to hide from the reality of it behind his sexual exploits.
Josh's boss called him into his office on Froday morning not saying what he wanted. The old man stood once Josh entered the professional glass office,
"Please Mr. Bailey. Have a seat."
Josh sat.
"Now it has come to my attention that you have recently been display very sexual behavior with female workers. This is against our policy here and under normal circumstances, I could have you fired."
"In normal circumstances?"
"Yes. Mr. Bailey, I am willing to temporarily disobey the company rules for you. I believe you have the potential to change."
Josh grinned,
"Thanks!" He was about to stand and leave when his boss held up a hand.
"I will speak to you now as a man and not as your boss." He leaned forward, "You need to detach yourself from that young lady. It's her that's causing your change."
"Sir, there are a lot of young ladies here, and if I may say so myself they're a fine bunch."
"Do not pretend like you don't know who I am speaking of Mr. Bailey. Sheila is causing you to become a, excuse my language, smut." His face contorted as he said the word smut, he continued, "Regardless of the vocabulary of pop culture the fact still stands. I want to see more of the Joshua I know. That Shiela-"
"Her name's Shira and I don't need your help." Josh interrupted flying to his feet. The old man leaned back,
"Fine then Mr. Bailey. Do what you will. I tried to help you. But by all means go a head. Go ahead and let that twisted woman turn you into something you are not. And let the consequences show." He withered finger like a claw and pointed towards the door without word, dismissing him. Josh rolled his eyes and exited the room, He was met by a passing gaggle of female workers.
"Hey ladies!" He threw his arm around the waist of a blonde in a floral skirt, "Nice skirt, is it cotton? It looks so soft." Josh's fingers played up and down her bottom. She giggled.
"Hey. I have a great idea. Why don't come with me to my office and we'll his soft it is without the skirt?" She blushed and then turned furious.
" I know your still not over Shira. I don't want to be one of your many one night stands. I want to be more than. The one your excited to come home too. The one you are happy to wake up next too. The one you buy fancy things even though you know it don't matter because I still love you." Josh's smile faded. Wow. That was deep. I had no idea she thought that big about me. I tried to think of something to say.
" Umm... I...I."
"Ohh I see. You just want someone to fuck whenever you get bored. That's all I am to you. A sex buddy. Oh well. Your not getting this pussy tonight. Bye." She walked away from him leaving Josh's mouth hanging wide open. How dare her? All these females in my life think they can come into my life and control me. Darn them! I'm not a man slut. Yeah I'm not a virgin but come on I'm a man for god sakes. I'm suppose to love sex. I was born to love sex. Do I want to meet "The one" yeah but when will that ever happen? He'd LaToya was the one, but. . .
Josh walks to his desk full of pictures of him and Shira. Josh looks at the mahogany desk and sighs picking up the pictures and shoving them into his desk drawer. The rest of the day was a blur. He stepped warily into the house and immediately a tension came over him. Something was up. A male voice drifted from up the hall,
"Oh LaToya. . ."
What was happening? I knew it! She's been cheating on me this whole time!
Josh stormed forward towards the noise but stopped when other snippets of conversation drifted up the hall,
"Sweetie, you two obviously still have something. I mean, why would you still let him stay if you don't still love him?"
"Well. . .I guess so, but he has so many problems with him. He barely even says hi when he come home. Whenever we're in the same room I just feel this sticky, nasty feeling, He's such a stupid-"
"Hun' why do you think he comes home every afternoon? I'm gonna tell it to you the way I see it sweetie. You two pretend to hate each other, you fight, you try to push yourselves farther and farther apart. But sweetie, you two still love eachother. You just need to rekindle that fire you have."
"Honestly I don't know anymore Antoine. It's just so frustrating. Anyway whatever, should I play the song again?"
"sure sweetie." Flowing cords from a piano followed. And then a sweet soft voice–was that LaToya? Her voice flowed on fluctuated and bending in harmony with the chords. He'd never heard her voice before it was enchanting. The song finished and the male voice spoke again,
"Amazing sweetie. I'll talk to Mr. Peresom about it okay hun'? Oh my gosh this is going be, like, the next Hello. I've gotta go. Keep practicing that song. Buh-bye hun'."
A short man with a cascade of reddish brown hair scurried out of the room,
"Oh hi sweet pea! You must be Josh!" The man stuck out a
hand, "I'm Antoine. I'm from the promoting department."
Josh looked at Antoine then shot LaToya a withering look.
"Get out of my house!"
"Well I heard that it's apparently not really your house sweetie. This house legally belongs to-Ah!" Josh's fist collided with Antoine's jaw. Like a little frightened mouse he scurried away and out of the house. Once the door had fully shut LaToys exploded,
"Your house! Oh really?! Why don't I just kick you out of your house you little liar! I can't believe you would. . ." LaToya stopped as her chest heaved in a big sigh, "Josh, I can't do this anymore. I mean what am I supposed to do? Keep fighting with you over who's house this is? Josh, this is our house and I love you. I don't want our fighting to tear our relationship apart. Please Josh, I'm asking you to forgive me. . .for everything."
Josh paused. It felt like a war was taking place inside him; a mental battle of which the winner would make the disision. Thoughts swirled around in his head bouncing off his skull and getting confused and tangled up in his other thoughts. What was he going to do? Don't forgive! Leave her and find a nice girl to bang with for a while. She doesn't deserve your forgiveness! One part of him screamed. He wanted to just leave it all behind, leave LaToya behind. All this pain and anger building up between them, the way LaToya would look at him, the way they interacted with eachother. Josh just wanted to toss all the problems away and get lost in sex. What would he do? Forgive her. She completely deserves all the forgiveness you can give her. She's done so much for you. But didn't he deserve an apology? LaToya had done him wrong many times too. Everything was dissolving around vhim and he clutched his head. There had to be some compromise in this situation. Some way to wiggle his way out of saying Yes–while still not saying no either. Josh remembered the feelings he'd felt in that kiss; longing and passion, the flutter in his chest, the warmth. . .blah, blah, blah. Was all of that really valuable enough to give LaToya his forgiveness? A Josh who'd just escaped arrest for indecent exposure would have said yes. A Josh who had just had his heart broken by a woman who Josh had poured out his heart–and his fortune–out to would've said yes. A Josh who's been taken in off the street by LaToya would say yes. But this Josh was different. He opened his mouth,
"No." Josh expected LaToya to cry. Instead her eyes were filled with a fiery rage that would once have been atractive. She said nothing, but stared acidulous daggers at him, cutting through his flesh. Her look seemed to say "Your lucky I don't kick you out." And then something changed in her expression. Behind the hurt and anger came a weird emotion Josh couldn't place as if LaToya knew something he didn't, LaToya let out a knowing evil laugh that made him shiver,
"See you at the party tonight." She swept from the room dramatically.