In a world not our own

Drive,Bones, drive!

McCoy was lost in thought sitting in the van, all tensed up, staring into the desert. Jim got into the front passenger seat (because Spock reported that he would rather be in the back where there would the least and less likely changes of being hit by stray bullets or be thrown out of the vehicle through the windshield if there were a accident, but that didn't phase Jim apparently) then shut the door and Spock slammed the passenger side door shut which made the doctor look over, white faced, and a little jumpy. McCoy relaxed recognizing the two men.

But that quickly faded when he saw there were two men not three in the van with him.

"Where is Doctor Smith?" Mc Coy said.

"Dead." Spock said.

"Aw, I liked that young boy," McCoy said, and then he floored it turning away from the base then speeded off. "How did you manage not to get caught?"

"Statistics." Spock said.

"Like he said." Jim said.

McCoy looked over toward Spock with a look of disbelief.

"You bored them to death?" McCoy said.

"No, I made a illogical and unreasonable announcement regarding the weather," Spock said. "Using irrational statistics and percentages."

McCoy laughed.

"Oh my god," McCoy said, in between his laughter. "You actually did it. You lied about the weather!"

"You act as though it is a breakthrough." Spock said, confused.

"Everything you do without logic is a break through,Spock." Jim said.

McCoy pressed a button on the radio.

The theatrical soundtrack of Star Wars started playing.

"Wrong soundtrack." McCoy said.

McCoy pressed the button, again.

"BURN FOR ME BABY LIKE A--"

McCoy changed the channel.

"Cause baby, I am perfect for you--"

McCoy changed the channel.

"Cause you are beautiful, just the way you are!"

McCoy changed the channel, again.

"Cause I am anaconda!" Came a woman's voice.

McCoy and Jim's eyes widened.

"No!" Both men said.

McCoy changed the station.

"Cause I am coming over on a Sunday night." Came a low and calm voice that was country like.

The two men relaxed.

"What do you have against anacondas?" Spock asked.

"That is not even close to being a song." McCoy muttered.

"Worst 'song' I ever heard," Jim said. "I wish they would stop playing it."

"What song?" Spock asked.

"It is more of a 'dance-at-a-party' song," McCoy said. "And there's no mood for dancing."

"What song?" Spock asked, again.

"It is called Anaconda by Nickey Minaj," Jim said. "We had the unfortunate luck to listen to it last week."

McCoy shuddered.

"What is it about?" Spock asked.

"Sexiness, cocaine, and oh my god . . ." McCoy shuddered. "I rather not talk about it."

Spock looked over in the back seeing a pair of black van's headed their direction.

"I do believe we are being chased." Spock said.

"Ludicrous speed!" McCoy pressed a button.

The white van dashed through the speed limit of everything in particular. McCoy had apparently a lot of practice with this machine as he knew how to operate it. McCoy pressed the button once again to where they ended up in traffic. Jim had a glare at McCoy, that was mostly of recognition and 'is this really happening?'. Spock could see a entire sea below. They were most likely on a interstate headed toward Florida or some other island bound location surrounded by water.

"Spaceballs, really?" Jim asked.

Spaceballs?, Spock thought looking over to McCoy.

"Did you see the white beams flying past us?" McCoy said. "How can one not label it ludicrious speed?"

"Space Balls is a spoof of Star Wars and it is meant to be silly." Jim said.

"Warp Speed was intended to be a silly word until we got momentum in their culture and became a serious subject." McCoy said.

"Warp Speed makes sense," Spock said. "Ludicrous speed sounds silly. It is not a logical word to apply to the speed of a shuttle or vessel."

McCoy sighed.

"Jim, we are so taking this back with us."

"Bones, we are not."

"I like this van."

"It does not belong in our time."

"Well it doesn't belong in this time!"

"Yes, it does."

"Jim, but I like it."

Jim sighed.

"Our cars are better than theirs," Jim reminded McCoy. "Press a button and they go. These . . . machines . . . require car keys!"

"Some of them operate a lot like ours." McCoy argued back.

"How long does traffic last here?" Spock asked.

McCoy grinned,and so did Jim.

"Hold onto that thought," Jim said, then he took out a walkie talkie. "Mr Stone, prepare to beam us into your garage."

"Yes, Admiral." Came a Irish voice.

"Old school works the best." Jim said.

"I like old school technology." McCoy said, referring to the white van.

"Me too, especially ours." Jim said, referring to the Enterprise.

Bands of yellow circles surrounded the white van making it fade before the eyes of several people. Some people had their phones on and recorded what was going on. The white van had see through windows that showed a discussion being initiated in the white van with men resembling older versions of McCoy,Spock, and Captain Kirk. Some people screamed shortly after the white van vanished and panicked. Why where they recording the van in the first place? Because these people were bored and randomly taking videos of traffic being silly until something had arrived in a white jet of light. They had it all on video.

All of it.

This video would be blasting on the news station in different versions and angles.