Distance Wont Hold Us

Questions Go Unanswered

Cas' Pov:
I am glad I told him why I didn't write for like 2 weeks. I can't imagine what was going on in his mind. "it would drive me crazy" is what I thought as I walked into Allen's room. She hands out letters! I Wonder what he said. I read it in my heart drops. no..more...talking... I'm really sad now do I write back?? My eyes tear up as I repeat "you're better than this you can handle this you've never met him" I decide to write him back
" Dean,
Even if you don't use it here is my number.. 425 - 698 - 2501. I'm always here, Dean.
-Cas."
I never sign them with just Cas but I'm trying to keep it simple and to the point. I hope he texts me. If not, it's okay I guess. Now just to wait a text I guess. Hopefully of some sort from Dean. We got kind of are close, but it's silly I'm hurting a little over someone I barely know. I'm I barely physically know him but emotionally know him well enough to know how great of a guy he is. His personality is very infectious and I like it. I just have to search for a plausible explanation on why I was so attached. Maybe it is because I want to feel again? Maybe I need a validation that I was good enough. Whatever it was, left. Whenever I needed that he gave me, was gone. And damn. It hurt.

Dean's Pov:
I acted like I didn't care. I opened his letter and for hours, even days even I wanted to text him or call. But distance is for the best. Maybe not for my emotions but for him. He's a nice guy I can't just disappear on him. I would feel so guilty if I did. Giving him a warning was the right thing to do. A week past and it was eating me alive. I text him finally.
Me: Cas? Hi.
Cas: Dean!?
I don't text back, what do I say? How do I ask? I never really done this before, oh boy. On YouTube I click on a side-bar song "goner" by twenty one pilots and I don't know if I like it. And I think why I even texted him bad idea. Terribly bad idea. This will be hard.. Is not texting back better or worse? I don't know... The real question is why does it even bother me? This should not bother me he's merely a pebble in the road and I'm in my car. Damn I sound poetic.

Cas' Pov:
He texted me once but never responded when I asked if it was Dean. I'm afraid to try and text him because he didn't text me back. That was probably a mistake, I'm kind of always a mistake. I try not to think negatively, but it's been a week since he texted. I'm probably overreacting. I got so caught up and someone flirting with me that I let myself go wildly emotional. I let him in too soon and got too attached. He was just everything that I wanted it, and I gave in too soon. I'm such an idiot. We met pretty quick, but our friendship and then even quicker. I wish we could have met in person, and hug, it but it would make this harder but it would make me happier. I play "navy blue" by The Story So Far, and look up at the ceiling singing along. Music really helps in times like these. Music is an escape for me, I don't know where I would be without it. I wish that he could realize that he's almost important as music is to me and that's sad because we've never even met in music is almost everything to me.

Dean's Pov:
Me: Yeah.. Its Dean... I'm so sorry for kind of leaving, I...
I erased the text, I cant text him, distance is the key. I repeat some myself "distances is the key distance". Distance is the best but damn it hurts like a bitch. I don't know how much longer I can keep up this silent treatment when he is all I think about.. This isn't fair but he'll forget about me, I'm very forgettable. This makes me feel like more of a douchebag than people already tell me I am. I don't know if I can keep this up. I hate hurting people town to town, city to city. And the worst part is we never actually met and he doesn't even live here. And the fact that Sammy kept calling in my boyfriend maybe want him to be my boyfriend but that's weird because I don't do relationships I'm just a hookup kind of guy. I wish I can say I just wanted to hook up with him but I can't he's too great to play with. WHY AM I EVEN THINKING THIS WAY!?!!? THIS. IS. NOT. OKAY. I HAVE NEVER MET HIM AND I NEVER WILL THIS NEEDS TO FUCKING STOP I HAVE TO GET AWAY FROM HERE AND LEAVE AND.... no matter where i go he will always be in my head, so what is even the use?... the only thing that I have learned from all of this is that distance makes the heart grow fonder.