How can I remember to forget?

Chapter 12

I felt shivers up and down my spine as his hands clasp around my waist making my knees weak. I couldn't carry myself anymore so all of my weight was leaning on Nate's arm as I feel his breath all over my neck.

"This is not right but.." I blurted it.

"But?" he asked.

"I waited for years to do this..I..I'm still..in..love..with you.."

What the fuck did I say? Can I take it back?! Gosh!

He looked at me and grabbed my face.. the next thing that happen is out of my control..

He kisses me hardly. He carry me towards the bed as I rest my back against it.

"Kiss me back or I'll stop.." he whispered on my ears. I can feel that tickling sensation.

My mind is telling me to not but..there, I kissed him back. I don't want to miss this tonight, just tonight.

He wanders his hands behind my back, unhooking my bra. He started to unbutton my shirt still kissing me.

I'm breathing heavily now. I don't know but this is new to me. I have never been like this. The way he touches me leave me shivering, it's like I'm missing this part of my life. I know I love him, I'm madly in love with him up until now. Am I really ready for this?

He made me feel something that I have never been before. I don't think another man could make me feel this way again.

He was tracing his finger down my thighs, more higher and closer.. He slowly undress me finally.. I hold my breath quivering. Ganito ba talaga ang feeling? Parang bumagal ang bawat minuto.

When he touched me with the tip of his tongue, slowly again and again.. I can't help myself but to moan.. and until I felt like there was a storm inside of me. I can no longer...

"Nate, please..." He looked at me. I can see in his eyes how passionately he wanted this.

He slowly inserted his to mine.

"I know this gonna hurt..Sorry.. " He said while moving.

I felt so weak that I couldn't move. I felt like there were stars exploding inside of me. Is this even real? How can someone made me feel like this? My body never knew such pleasure and my heart only knew such pain. The fact that he is with someone else tears me apart. Okay, just for tonight. I'll forget every bad thing about him.

"Do you think you can still handle this?" He asked politely in between our kisses.

I nodded and kissed him back.

Yes, we did it a couple of times. Until both of us were so tired. We are catching our breath already.

"Thank you for tonight.." He said and kiss me again. I don't know what to say.. I just smiled at him and lean on his arms.

Tonight, we are like couples having their honeymoon. Gosh. I know myself that this is not right but I can't help this. Just tonight, I want my happiness. All I think was the years that we both wasted. If only I could turn back time. I'm still so young to handle that situation so vulnerable.

The sun light woke you up, I didn't want to be awake yet, knowing that I'm still here in his room and that weird feeling that he's next to you brought chills to my stomach.

Nate was asleep still, he looked incredibly peaceful. Damn! Did we really make love last night? Oh, stop thinking like it was close to love. Wake up, Katerina!

I immediately stood up looking for my things. I couldn't catch my breath while doing my best not to wake him up. Gosh. I could be a professional thief! . After watching him for the last time, I went out of his room.

I walked out as fast as I can, I can't even remember how I went home.

I don't want to eat. I just want to sleep until tomorrow. But as I was about to close my eyes as I lay on my bed. My phone keep on ringing. I didn't even bother to check who is calling.

"Hello?" with my sleepy voice.

"Hello, Kat!This is Samantha. Just want to ask some updates. Did you finish it already?" Napabalikwas ako ng bangon.

"Yes,speaking of your gown.It's all good.You can fit it anytime you want. We can set a meeting on your convenient time" while composing myself.

"Wow!Nate is really right.You are the best!Hmm.Can we meet later?Three in the afternoon?Is that okay with you?" malumanay na sabi niya.

"Hmm.Yes,we can have meeting later.See you!"I exhaled and humiga ulit sa bed.

It's 12pm so I still have time to rest.Nagising ako sa alarm at nagmamadaling maligo.

I wore a crop top and black pants. She texted me that we'll meet in my boutique. So I drove that fast because I might be late. Traffic pa naman.

"J?Sorry.I didn't came here early.I came from hmmm.Out of town." I saw her arranging my files. She already fix everything her for our meeting. What would I do without her?

"I know.I won't ask with whom because I can feel it." Nangunguyang sambit niya.

Nagpakurapkurap ako.I can't say anything about us.I'm a sinner.Kabit ba ako?No.What I did last night was unforgivable.

I was about to reason out when Serena arrived.

"Hello,Girls!"She kissed our cheeks and hugged us tight.

"Hi,Uhm.This is your gown.Try it.I know you'll be the prettiest bride." Seriously,Kat? Ang plastic mo.Sana sampalin nalang ako ni Samantha.