You're Reading My Mind

He's Special

When I joined twitter.

I made friends and enemies.

One day I gave up.

I wrote on twitter that I'm giving up.

I deactivated my account.

Couple of hours later I decided to activate it again.

Only to find my followers 0.

I panicked.

Then Iyaz, a guy that's so special to me told me that it'll take time to adjust it again.

I've been talking to him since then.

We both shared secrets.

Laughed.

Cried.

Had arguments like an angry couple.

Got together.

Then one day I realized I was falling in love with him.

I told him that.

But he didn't have the same feelings.

He liked me as a really close best friend.

We stopped talking.

I was being a bitch to him.

When he deactivated his account which was like once in a month.

I used to panic.

I shouted at him.

For making me scared.

He promised he'll always be there for me.

We only knew each other from internet.

I have never seen his picture.

When I showed him mine.

He said I was beautiful.

Which no guy has ever told me.

He made me feel like I was the only girl in the world.

So special.

Took care of me.

Knew my secrets.

Tried stopping me from cutting.

He was someone I'd never forget.

I dreamed about him.

Wished I'd meet him in real life.

But one day it all changed for me.

He sent me a message saying.

"For you Saniya, I'd jump off a bridge, love you beautiful, I'll kiss those scars soon! x"

And just like that.

He was gone.

No messages.

Nothing.

I still follow him.

It was a stab to the heart.

I still remember him.

I go through our messages.

Nobody can replace him.

Too scared to fall in love now.

I'm scared I'd lose someone else just as I lost Iyaz.

I love you Iyaz...